zelda_queen: (Zelda)
ZeldaQueen: Hello, dear lords and lasses! Now that Bree Tanner has been sporked to her grave, it's time to take this puppy on, full time!

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zelda_queen: (Spork)
Projection Room Voices: Are you...quite prepared for this? You haven't finished your first assignment yet. To take on a second, and one such as this...

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zelda_queen: (Team)

ZeldaQueen: This is it, folks! The last hurrah! The home stretch! And to celebrate, we're joined once more by Link, Midna, and Ganondorf! Shall we begin?

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zelda_queen: (Team)
ZeldaQueen: Well folks, as you all may recall, Dark Link was killed in an extremely improbable though predictable use of deus ex machina, by way of the Sue setting herself alight and burning him up. Now as you know, I'm saving all ranting for this chapter, since this is the chapter were it's all properly explained. Midna and Ganondorf are still here and they've helped me tie Link to a chair, since we're fairly sure that the contents of this chapter will send him into a frothing rage. So, time to get started!

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zelda_queen: (Team)
ZeldaQueen: Well everyone, this is it - the big show down with Dark Link. Plus, there's only four more chapters until this thing is done!

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zelda_queen: (Link)

ZeldaQueen: Howdy folks! Remember how annoying Jenna's been about being pregnant? Well...strap in!

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zelda_queen: (Link)
ZeldaQueen: Well, I'm back and so is Link and we've got more of the epic sucky mediocre tale of Jenna. I won't lie to you folks, this chapter and the next one or two really steam my clams. I mean, I know we just had the God-awful sex and all, but there's going to be a lot of insane entitlement here and that's what I really hate in this

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zelda_queen: (triforce)

Projection Room Voices: Are you...settled? Ready to continue the chapter?

ZeldaQueen: Just a minute. I want to get a couple more sporkers to help me out here.

Projection Room Voices: Who'll you have?

ZeldaQueen: I need some people who are tougher, who can handle a few more chapters...bring me Midna, Zant, Majora, and Link!

Projection Room Voices: Right away. *intercom* Will Link the Hero of Time, Zant Usurper of Twilight, Majora, and Midna the Twilight Princess please report to the Sporking Chamber?

*minutes pass while elevator music plays*

Midna: What is it now? I had the day off.

ZeldaQueen: You're helping me spork the rest of this chapter of Breaking Dawn.

Link: What? You've got to be kidding me!

ZeldaQueen: And if you're good, I'll have you help me with some other chapters.

Zant: Oh, horray! I do love a good sporking! This is so exciting, isn't it Midna?

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zelda_queen

March 2016

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