The Realm of Literacy

ZeldaQueen: Folks, there comes a time when something reaches critical wank capacity. Anyone who's been a member of das_sporking for any length of time probably knows that by now. Still, that doesn't make it any more pleasant to watch when it unfolds in front of you.

Especially when it involves a group of people that have held a special spot in your heart for half a decade or so.

Gehayi: Most of you have probably heard about the now SEVENTY-THREE PAGE Google Doc "Not So Awesome" that has been circulating, as of this writing, for the past week or two. For those who haven't read it, it's a documentation of complaints from producers who no longer work for Channel Awesome. I have been following most of these people on LiveJournal, Twitter and Tumbr starting in 2006. I've seen their complaints voiced since about 2011. This is not sudden. I've read Allison Pregler's complaints before. I recall when Lindsey Ellis and her friends up and left without warning. There have long been hints--hints as strong as concentrated skunk scent--that something was wrong with Channel Awesome.

But I never expected it to be as bad as "Not So Awesome" revealed it to be.

( Read more... )

So, the last few days haven't exactly been what I'd call busy, but they just felt cramped. I joined a gym recently and have been giving myself Tuesdays and Thursdays after work to go there. Add in that an upcoming Valentine's Day meant (A) getting a bunch of cookies and candies ready for work and (B) preparing for my date with my boyfriend and I didn't really have a lot of time to do much. I've been getting some sporking done and
trying to keep on top of the dishes (of which there seem to be too many in the sink at any given time), but I haven't had much chance to do things like keep track of the antics of my toys. And by "antics" specifically, I mean that I haven't had a chance to open up the Ocarina of Time figurines, as I had promised Figma Link I would do.

For anyone curious as to how things turned out, Link had spent the night on my mousepad and slept in most of the morning (as he does). I just sort of ran the mouse around him, thankful it was wireless, and let him be. Hey,
I'm not going to demand anyone be up and at 'em before noon on a Sunday, especially since I myself tend to be pretty lazy on weekend mornings.

When he did wake up, he just sort of quietly chilled by my laptop, practicing his sword work and such. By  mid-afternoon he told me he was ready to head back to the window sill, so I helped him get his sword and
shield in hand and his sheath strapped back on him and gave him a lift up there. He was really quiet the whole time. Like, I know Links as a whole tend to be a quiet lot, but he just had this air about him. I got the feeling. I know there are times when a person just needs to get away from their usual places and have some quiet time until they feel recharged enough to get back. But still, I'm a little worried about him.

I haven't really told about the layout of my apartment yet, but long story short, I have this three-tiered plastic rack-thing that was in the room when I moved in. The bottom level holds the old Mario Kart 64 toys, along
with a handful of other Mario and Donkey Kong-related items.



The middle level has most of my Gashpon-ish items for Legend of Zelda, as well as a hodge-podge of other little figurines.



The top level holds my alarm clock and two item sets, Ganondorf/Phantom Ganondorf on his horse and Impa and Child Zelda on their horse, both of whom are guaranteed to get smacked most mornings as I sleepily try to turn off the alarm clock. I also banished Homicidal Epona there, after her little altercation with Figma Link.



So yeah, long story short, I have a lot of little items. Most of them don't interact with Figma Link, though. I'm not sure what it is, but the smaller LOZ figurines seem to keep to themselves. They have their own little area and look after themselves and while they don't seem to dislike Figma Link, he just isn't someone they seem to  concern themselves with too much. The same with the Mario Kart folks, although I think that's a bit less awkward for Link, seeing as they aren't from the same canon.

Figma Link currently shares a shelf with my S.H.Figuarts Sailor Moon and Luna and my Princess Sapphire figurine.



He seems to get along well enough with them, but...well, I get the sense that he wants someone a little more...relatable? I guess? He doesn't talk about it, but I think that's why he's so keen on getting the OOT figurines out and about.

Anyway, I've considered keeping him on my desk more often so he can at least watch whatever I do on my laptop, but that tends to freak out the two gashapon LOZ figurines that pretty much already live there.



Those two, a Deku Scrub and an Octorok, have been camped out on my laptop for my past few days of eBay trawling, trying to convince me to buy more enemies. This means there are frequently exchanges like the one going on now.

"It'll be great!" Deku Scrub squeals. "You like having us around, right?"



"You didn't cost thirty bucks apiece," I pointed out. "This stuff's coming over from Japan, you know. And it's a bit more rare than you guys were."

Yeah, that's the sucky thing. Most LOZ stuff isn't distributed in the United States, at least not figurine-wise. Oh, there used to be a few good things, but they're discontinued, which jacks up the price like woah. Try searching for any of the Majora's Mask toys and see how reasonably they're priced, if they're even around at all. Go on, I'll wait. A lot of the stuff, however, are gashapon items and thus only available in Japan. Thus, they tend to be a bit pricier than anything that is available over here.

"What about that bunch of stuff you were looking at?" Deku Scrub pointed out. That came with a Stalfos and a Lizlafos!"


Octorok made some sound like, "Blurble", which apparently meant, "Yeah!"

"I don't think you'd want me to do that," I said. "It comes with those two *and* two Links and a Zelda. Why would you want those guys around?" (I actually wouldn't have minded them. My hang-up was the shipping on the order. Eesh...)

Deku Scrub, however, seemed nonplussed. "Eh, we don't care. Just take away the shields."

"They look molded on. Those are older Link figurines. One of them is from the NES-era. They don't have a lot of removable bits, like Figma Link does."

"Right, right." Deku Scrub suddenly bristled. "Speaking of him, he's stabbing at the other Link."

"WHAT?"

Deku Scrub and Octorok trot off merrily while I scan the room.

I didn't have to look far. Figma Link, who clearly gives Solid Snake a run for the money in the stealthiness  department, had snuck onto my desk, found the still-wrapped OOT toys, and was standing over OOT Link with the Goddess Sword in hand.



"What the hell?!?" I shouted.

He glanced at me. "You promised," he said, the slightest hint of an accusatory tone in his voice.

Before I could come up with a response, he stabbed the sword down.