Crescendo: Chapter 15 (Part 1)
Mar. 25th, 2014 09:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zelda_queenZeldaQueen: And now for a chapter that somehow manages to feel entirely pointless, even though it supposedly involves Nora making a breakthrough. Also, warnings - this chapter has it made clear that Nora is aware Patch stalks her, but doesn't care.
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
Chapter 15 (Part 1)
ZeldaQueen: Okay, guys. When we last left off, Nora had just had several...uh, revelations about the guy who may or may not have murdered her father. She also believes that Scott is involved in an underground Nephilim society and is being chased by a sinister man who goes by the title of, “Black Hand”.
So, how does this next chapter open up?
“I was deep in a dream when the phone shrilled. I stuck an arm out sideways, swept my hand over the night-stand, and located my cell phone. “Hello?” I said, wiping drool from the rim of my mouth.”
ZeldaQueen: Well, isn't that a riveting follow-up!
I honestly do not get why Fitzpatrick does this with her writing. She will putter around, finally have something halfway interesting happen, and then completely forget about it by the next chapter. Because that up there? That's not just a misleading opening. It's not like Nora answers the phone, remembers what happens the night before, then actually ponders it and plans accordingly. No, the first half or so of this entire chapter is around Vee and Nora taking a trip to the beach. The only Black Hand-related thing that happens is only loosely related to Scott and what happened at the party.
This is just bad writing. It keeps the story incredibly dull, since it takes an important revelation and stuffs it in to the back to make way for irrelevant things. Not only that, but it makes Nora look incredibly stupid. So far as we see, she's forgotten all about the stuff she's just learned. This would be like if, in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, Rowling ended the chapter with the reveal that Hagrid opened the Chamber, then had most of the next chapter devoted to Harry, Ron, Seamus, and Dean planning an outing for the day.
The book could have had it both ways. It could have been written that Nora couldn't figure out what to do with the information she learned, so she decided to rest on it and go out with Vee to relax. But she doesn't even think about any of it until about halfway through! If it had been written that she woke up and Scott's confession came flooding back? That she was having dreams about her dad's death? That she pondered it all as she went to class? Any of that would have fixed this problem! So not only is this bad writing, but it's bad writing that could have easily been fixed even to a small degree!
Bah. Onward.
So, as I said, we open with Vee calling about them going to the beach after class. We are then “treated” to komedy as Nora gets a look at the clock and sees it's six-something in the morning.
Yes, Vee – who has constantly been characterized as the fat, lazy friend – is perky and wide-awake at six in the morning. And yes, yes, I'm aware that people do not come with packaged sets of traits and that just because someone, say, isn't good with exercising doesn't mean they can't be early risers. But Fitzpatrick doesn't write characters like that. And like I said, Vee's always been shown as pretty lazy.
On the other hand, Nora being awake at six is treated as her being up unbelievably early. Now don't get me wrong. I'm hardly a morning person myself. I'm pretty pissy in the mornings as well. The thing is, Nora's class starts at eight. She's supposed to live way out of town and has no car of her own. How much time, exactly, does she give herself to get ready? When I was in school, it took me roughly an hour to get myself awake, eat breakfast, and get all my stuff together. Now granted, I'm pretty slow in the mornings and one could argue that Nora skips breakfast or gets her stuff together the night before. Even so, getting up at six doesn't sound like it should be much earlier than when she ought to be getting up, especially since it's being played up like she was woken up at midnight.
Also, unless Nora walks to school (which would really make me think she'd need two hours!), I'd imagine Vee would be picking her up. If that's the case, why doesn't Vee just tell Nora about these plans while driving her to school? It's not like they need to go to the beach immediately after class lets out. It would be noon at the latest. You would have the entire afternoon to go home, get your stuff, and go out.
Ah, wait, I forgot. If they did that, then we'd be spared this hilarious scene of Vee yammering about which bikini to wear. And of course it's a bikini, which is fine for her, of course. I mean, Marcie's slammed for wearing stuff like that, but Vee? It's justified because, as she mentions in a bit, she's doing it to impress her boyfriend.
YOU FUCKING WHORE – 83
So yeah, the entire rest of the scene is just komedy. Nora hangs up and tries to go back to sleep, Vee calls at the home phone and keeps redialing, no matter how much Nora tries to ignore her, and finally reveals that this was all about what color bikini Nora thinks would best impress Rixon. Nora is not too happy to hear that Vee's bringing her boyfriend along on their outing, but instead of doing something radical like not bringing Rixon, Vee just acts like the only other option is to let Nora stay at home and mope.
For the life of me, I do not understand how people think Vee is a good friend. She is just horrible! Her friend just went through a very painful break-up and I can understand the thought of, “She shouldn't hide in her house, I'll encourage her to go out more.” But then she thinks it's great to drag her boyfriend's best friend along? Okay, I might buy that...except that Rixon and Nora have hardly interacted at all! There's nothing to show that all three of them could go out and have fun together. In fact, Nora even anticipates that the outing will just be her sitting there while Vee and Rixon make out!
In other words, Vee's big plans to take Nora out to lift her spirits boil down to, “I'll take out my heartbroken friend and help her get over her ex by making out with his best friend in front of her.”
Also, didn't Vee say something hilarious about men liking independent women? I can understand being nervous about a guy you like seeing you in a swimsuit for the first time, but this is just one more thing Vee's done in a long line of “What can I do to best appeal to and impress Rixon?” It's not like we ever hear anything about Rixon worrying about impressing Vee or doing special things for her. No, Rixon is a Hot Guy, so he just has to show up and girls are instantly satisfied. It's up to them to pretty themselves up to his standards.
We then jump ahead to Vee and Nora driving to the beach. Well, that first part was just so vital, wasn't it? I'm certainly glad that was there!
Anywho, Vee bitches about the lack of parking and then decides that it'll be fine to park in an employee's only parking lot. Nora warns her that this not a good idea and that Vee will get towed, but Vee waves that off as simply a scare tactic to keep the riffraff out. Between this and the worst shoplifting attempt ever in the first book, Vee is rapidly reaching Ana Steel levels of “Does not get how the world works”. Frankly, I'm insulted that I'm supposed to see her as how most sixteen-year-olds are. At the very least, I know my sixteen-year-old self knew more than this!
Oh, and she insists that no one will notice her car in there. Because people totally don't recognize their co-workers cars, nope. Instead, Vee figures that her car will blend right in, as “All these cars speak low class.”
ZeldaQueen: Fuck. You. Vee.
We get to sit through a much-too-long description about Vee parking, Nora getting their bags (and the food and water and everything else that's in said bags), and them heading off to the beach.
They settle in and of course Vee's first comment is “Normally I’d say we should go check out those guys, but Rixon is so hot, I’m not even tempted.” Hormones don't work like that, Vee. And don't we just love how shallow and superficial Vee is? She's only able to resist ogling a bunch of guys because Rixon's hotter than them, not because Rixon is so charming or witty or engaging that she enjoys his company that much.
Vee has the balls to tell Nora off for not sounding happy about Rixon showing up, because God forbid Nora be bothered about being a third wheel (imagine that, I'm actually backing Nora up on this). Nora asks where Rixon is, and Vee tells her that he's off running a few errands, but will be by later. We then see more evidence that Vee is a complete moron when it comes to picking guys to date.
“'Who knows? Probably Patch roped him into doing a favor. Patch always has something he needs Rixon to run off and take care of. You’d think Patch could just do it himself. Or at least pay Rixon, so he’s not taking advantage of him. Do you think I should wear sunscreen? I’m going to be really mad if I go to all this trouble and don’t get a tan.'
'Rixon doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who lets people take advantage of him.'
'People? No. Patch? Yes. It’s like Rixon worships him. It’s so lame. It makes my stomach heave. Patch is not the kind of guy I want my boyfriend aspiring to be.'
'They have a long history together.'
'So I’ve heard. Blah, blah, blah. Probably Patch is a drug dealer. No. Probably he’s an arms dealer and has Rixon out playing the sacrificial mule, gunrunning for free and risking his neck.'”
ZeldaQueen: Vee. Darling. Baby. You were introduced to Rixon through Patch. Rixon acts almost exactly the same as Patch. By your own admittance, they are old friends who are probably tied up in the same shady business.
Why the fuck would you think Rixon isn't already exactly like Patch?!?
I'm serious. Rixon is ambiguously somewhere in the late teens and early twenties. He's well in the age range where HE CAN MAKE HIS OWN INFORMED DECISIONS. I mean, seriously? Vee thinks that Patch is somehow manipulating Rixon into doing for him? Unless Patch has fantastic blackmail material on the guy, why does she think Rixon would so blindly risk his life smuggling drugs or weapons (and is that supposed to be a serious guess? Please tell me it was Vee being ridiculous)? That goes well beyond hero worship or whatever Vee thinks is going on here. It ought to be blindingly obvious that whatever Rixon's doing, it's of his own free will.
Don't get me wrong, I can understand not wanting to believe that a person's loved one is already messed up. But this is not a case where someone who is a Bad Influence enters their life and twists them from being a good person to being rotten. Rixon and Patch are clearly already incredibly tight! So no, this doesn't look like Vee is scared and trying to think that Rixon is still good. This looks like she's totally oblivious to the real personality of the guy she's been dating for...what, a week? Probably even less. This is prime adult fear, guys. This is the clueless teen dating a genuinely creepy guy and being unaware of it because oh look, he's hot and is a fantastic kisser!
And yes Rixon is a creepy guy. He's a fallen angel who has been running around with Patch for centuries. We know he enslaved a Nephil. We know that he tried to have sex with at least one woman while wearing that poor bastard as a meat suit. We know he was completely aware of Patch's plan to murder Nora and Chauncey and only protested it on the grounds that it was probably impossible and not because, you know, MURDERING PEOPLE. We know this...and so does Nora. She knows this is who her best friend is dating, and she thinks it's fine. She doesn't think of any of the things Rixon did, probably because Fitzpatrick didn't think of them. The implications of what he did seem to have slipped by the Suethor and the fans, so Rixon is just a hot Irish guy.
Of course, there's another thing to consider. This isn't the first scenario where Vee dated a guy who was best friends with someone who wanted to be romantic with Nora and ended up being a threat. This doesn't seem to bother Vee, who simply finds it “lame” that her boyfriend is possibly tangled in something dangerous and illegal, along with a guy who she thinks murdered someone. Has Vee seriously forgotten the events of the first book? Has Fitzpatrick, for that matter?
One last thing to address here, folks – I'm pretty sure this is supposed to be foreshadowing. Look, guys! Patch and Rixon are so close! They just do everything for each other! Aside from making it look like Vee's just worried that her boyfriend and Nora's ex are secretly gay for each other, this is just utterly pointless. This is the only time we hear about this sort of thing. There's never any indication that Patch has total faith in Rixon and vice versa. In fact, in the flashback chapters, Rixon does nothing but insist that Patch's plans are boring and pointless and aren't going to work. We also never see any hints that they trust each other with personal matters. For as much as we know, these constant errands Vee's so pissy about are just Rixon picking up groceries!
Right. Onward.
Nora points out that if Rixon has no probably with his relationship with Patch, that Vee should leave it alone. Dear lord, is Fitzpatrick unaware of the homoerotic subtext here? Because first there was the Marcie/Nora foe yay, then Vee licking Nora's arm, then this, and now we have Nora getting Vee to rub sun lotion on her back. Wow.
Vee, meanwhile, keeps pushing on about how Patch is secretly involved in unsavory business. I have no problem with this because it's true, except that I know she'll conveniently forget about it when the plot demands it. She demands that Nora say aloud where Patch gets all his money from, and Nora says that it's exactly the same place Rixon gets his.
Somehow, instead of thinking that Nora doesn't get what she's going for, Vee figures that Nora's simply too ashamed to openly admit what Patch is up to. Yes, that's why she's not acting ashamed in the slightest. Vee actually marches over to a woman and her children and tries to get Nora to tell them what Patch does for a living.
On a side note, speaking of what Patch does for a living, did anyone remember that he was supposed to have a job installing security systems? That this isn't followed up on does nothing to quell the implication that he just faked that employment so he could tamper with the system and continue to stalk Nora.
Anywho, Nora is understandably appalled and drags Vee away, insisting finally that Patch makes his money through gambling. But no, that's not what Vee's going for. She insists that Patch's clothes are too expensive for what someone could make in gambling. Personally, I think someone should point out how he's ostensibly a high school student who no one has ever seen with his parents and apparently is able to support himself solely by finding a bunch of hardcore gangsters willing to gamble against a teenager.
Vee and Nora bicker, it's really boring, pointlessness abounds. You guys remember that Jeep he won in a poker game in the last book? That gets a callback as Vee says that Rixon heavily implied Patch got it through less than savory means. So what, that fucking Jeep gets brought back and Jules and Elliot don't? Patch's plan to murder Nora doesn't? Huh? In any case, Nora basically plugs up her ears and goes “La la la, not listening”.
*cross-eyed* What was the point of that? Okay, sorry, badly-worded question there. I know what the point of it was supposed to be. This is the New Moon of the series, so this is supposed to be the book that tests the “love” between Patch and Nora. This is supposed to be Nora having things waved in her face to make her doubt Patch, only for her to realize in the end that she really loves him and he really loves her and she shouldn't let lies fool her.
Yeah, that fails for a couple of reasons.
For starters, Patch is a criminal. We've gone over all the horrible things he's done, so feel free to remind yourself of them. By this point, you guys know full well why it's sound advice to run as fast as you can away from Patch.
There's another thing, though. This is Vee saying this. Vee, who says the most ridiculous shit I've ever heard. Vee, who either has a fondness for hyperbole or has a lot of vacant space for rent between her ears. Vee, who has been insisting since the last book that Patch is a dangerous guy and up to no good and Nora should stay away from him.
Why should this be seen as any different than her other outrageous claims? It's one thing for a Vee to list compelling reasons for why Nora should doubt Patch. But when that list includes speculation that he's a drug dealer or an arms smuggler, it kind of ruins any reasons to take it seriously. I mean, imagine that your best friend is dating someone, and you're sure something bad's up with them. You really, really don't think this person is safe, and you want your friend to get away from them ASAP. Would you really think that saying something like, “I bet that person is secretly a mob boss!” would convince your friend that you're being serious?
Honestly, nothing Vee's said can be taken as good reason to distrust Patch. Him being involved in illegal activities? What proof is there of that? Nora knows that Patch has been around for centuries. For all she knows, he has a secret stash of money saved up over time. Patch has four-hundred dollar jeans? Again, what proof? We have Vee's word, but it's not like she hangs around Patch enough to get a good look at the sort of pants he wears. Patch is pushing Rixon around, making him be involved in shady business? Vee has no idea what the fuck Patch is asking Rixon to do! Not to mention that, given how clingy people in this series are, for all we know, “constantly ordering him around” could translate to, “has him pick up the dry cleaning every Friday afternoon”.
Now granted, Vee doesn't know that Patch is centuries old. But Nora does. And the way she gets pissy about all this indicates that what Vee's saying is hitting a nerve. It doesn't read like Nora can only tell Vee, “You've got it wrong” while privately thinking of how Patch could actually have gotten those things. Nora is acting like she can think of no alternate explanations but the ones given – Patch either gets all his money from gambling or he's doing shady things.
In all fairness, I suppose Nora's reaction could also be taken as her just being angry that Vee dares to make such accusations about her beloved Patch. It's difficult to say though, because even though Nora's narrating this story, yet again, we get zero insight into her thought process.
So we get on with the lotioning, with Vee naturally being obsessed with getting a tan to the point where she slathers baby oil on herself. How the HELL has she survived as long as she has?! Although Nora hardly comes off well, since she thinks of “images of skin cancer [she]’d seen at the doctor’s office”, yet apparently doesn't see fit to warn Vee. Again, are we supposed to be coming to conclusions from this, like that Nora is willing to let her friend burn for dissing Patch? I have no clue! I have no clue why Nora does any of this!
Oh, and Vee contemplates if she can get away with tanning topless, at a public beach. Of course. But she's not Trashy and Tasteless for proposing this. You know, unlike Marcie, who was written unfavorably for walking from Patch's car to her house in her underwear and leaving her wet dress behind.
YOU FUCKING WHORE - 84
Out of nowhere, Vee asks if Patch is still dating Marcie. Nora says that he is and JESUS CHRIST WOMAN, DO YOU CONSTANTLY SUFFER FROM MEMORY LOSS?!? In the last two or so chapters, he asked you to run away with him! It was you who decided that was impossible!!! If you decided, for contrived reasons, that the two of you can't date, fine! But you COULD tell Vee, “Things are complicated and I don't know what he's doing”. Your options aren't limited to “Dating Marcie” and “Dating Nora”!
Fitzpatrick said that this was the first book she wrote using an outline to keep the plot in order. I'm seriously wondering how that worked out for her, because this is reading like it was done via the Atlantic Nights writing method.
Vee gets grumpy and says that whatever's going on between the two won't last. Um, no dur. Marcie never really makes any secret of the fact that she isn't into long-term relationships. And while I actually understand Vee being angry talking about how her best friend's ex goes through women quickly, it all still has the unfortunate implications that we're supposed to look down on people who dare to prefer day-by-day, casual dating.
Nora tries to change the subject, Vee comments that she (Nora) seems to have something to let off of her chest, and Nora's mindset takes U-turn to deciding to tell Vee what's on her mind. Wow, I don't even think Phoenix Wright could make that fast of a turnabout! Nora decides that “[o]noxious or not” Vee deserves the truth, and tells her how Patch kissed her after they went to the Devil's Handbag.
ZeldaQueen: ...What?
Nora? Uh...why is that what you desperately need to confess to? How is that so pressing? This happened in Chapter 10. Between then and now, you have given no indication that this has been bothering you, Nora. You certainly never thought to bring it up when you were talking to Patch! You certainly never gave the impression before now that you felt Vee ought to know about it! WHERE THE BLOODY HELL DID THIS COME FROM?!?
Folks, you know what would have made much more sense for Nora to bring up here? THE BLACK HAND! There's no reason not to! Nora just learned about it last night, so it's fresh in her mind. Vee knows about the note and the ring Nora was sent. She knows Nora was thinking that her dad might have had shady circumstances surrounding his death. Nora could have said, “Remember how I got that note that said that someone called 'the Black Hand' murdered my father? I saw Scott last night, and he had a brand just like on the ring I got. He also said someone called the Black Hand gave it to him and may have stalked him here”. There! Not only does it fit in with what we just had, but it's exactly the sort of bullshit that Vee loves to eat up! Patch kissing Nora, though? That happened so far back, I pretty much forgot about it being relevant at all!
And it just keeps getting worse. Vee asks where this happened, and Nora decides to trim out the fantasy parts and just say it happened in her bedroom. She then follows it up with “I didn’t want to even think about what it meant that he now seemed capable of inserting himself into my dreams.”
ZeldaQueen: I... Nora, that is a very, very good thing to worry about. You've been swinging around, telling Patch to leave you alone. And now, you see that he can just pop into your dreams whenever he'd like. You are not safe from him anywhere, since you'll always be sleeping at some point or another.
WHY HAVE YOU NOT WORRIED ABOUT THIS BEFORE?
This has NEVER entered her thought process before now! In fact, I honestly thought the whole dream thing was just turned into a Big Lipped Alligator Moment, before now! I had no clue Nora was worried about Patch climbing into her head at night, because she'd only been worried about whether or not he was in love with Marcie!
This just makes Nora look even more horrible. What about all that previous stuff, about how she couldn't live without Patch and seriously was considering abandoning her home and her family and her friends and her school and shot at a career just to run off with him for a few weeks? What about her considering suicide when he explained what would happen if they stayed together? What about her going on about how the archangels were so corrupt and horrible, keeping the two of them from being together.
Now, we take all that and add in that apparently this whole time, Nora actually was worried about Patch's Freddy Krueger tendencies. AND SHE STILL WANTED TO RUN AWAY WITH THIS GUY. She still rolled her eyes when Vee said how much trouble he was! She still wept when it looked like he was interested in other girls. ALL OVER A GUY WHO, BY HER OWN ADMITTANCE, DID SOMETHING SHE CONSIDERED TOO WORRYSOME TO THINK ABOUT!!!
Vee, meanwhile, is alarmed that he got into Nora's house, asking, “You let him inside?” Ignoring the “that's what she said” jokes that could be made here... uh, yes, thank you, Patch's little nighttime meeting with Nora just got even creepier. It's like Vee suddenly had all our spitefics and arguments uploaded into her head, and was able to process just enough to suss out the very obvious Stranger Danger going on here.
It really is made worse (if possible) by Nora's response - “Not exactly, but he came in anyway.”
ZeldaQueen: You know, I'm hardly new to sporking. I've read Mervin's Twilight recaps. I know all about Fifty Shades of Grey. One would think I'd know better. But I just read that quote and wondered how the fuck ANY of the fans could have read that line and not wanted Nora to call the cops. I know, I know, folks probably have justifications like, “She enjoyed it”, or “It was just sexy fun!” or “It was her head and not her actual house, so it doesn't count”. That doesn't make it any better, though.
Vee actually is at a loss for words at this. Nora believes that it's because of her (Nora's) “idiocy”. Uh...while I'll agree that Nora is an idiot, how is Patch breaking into her room “idiocy” on her part? The only idiocy was that Nora didn't call the cops!
No, folks, we know what Nora means. Neither she nor Vee care about the fact that Patch broke in and entered and blatantly invaded Nora's privacy against her will. The only thing they care about is that he kiss her, and clearly it was all her fault the kiss happened, because Nora just has no self control.
I don't blame you guys if you can't remember how the kiss went down, given how long ago it happened and how ignored it was. To recap what happened, Nora became angry with Patch for helping Marcie instead of her. She orders Patch out multiple times, calling him a “traiterous” liar. Instead of doing what she asks, he wordlessly walks towards her, forcing her to back up until she is up against the wall. When she tries to call him more names, he pulls her against him by the waistband of her underpants. After staring at him for awhile, Nora leans in and starts kissing him.
Did Nora initiate the kiss itself? Yes. But Patch was the one who began acting in a flirtatious manner towards her first. He was the one who refused to leave when she told him to. He was the one who boxed her in and pulled her to him by grabbing her underpants.
So no, Nora, this is not a case where you can beat yourself up for being an idiot. This is a case where you call the cops or at least consult a priest about if there's precedent in Biblical lore for getting rid of stalker angels. This is also where I give you points because while the slut shaming is not overt, we're pretty obviously supposed to consider it Nora's fault that this happened, and not Patch's. Women are lustful, yo.
YOU FUCKING WHORE - 85
If you guys are holding onto some hope that Vee at least has a bit of sense, I'm very sorry for you. Because Vee listens to this all and her grand idea to deal with the situation is to have Nora swear a blood oath to never be alone with Patch. Because that will solve everything!
- Vee, did you miss the part where Patch broke into her house? This was not Nora willingly going out somewhere with him. Telling someone to resolve not to go places alone with their stalker doesn't work, because it's really not up to them if the stalker tries to catch them alone. A more appropriate course of action would be getting a stronger security system for the house and filing for a restraining order.
- Going off of that, a blood oath? Really? Are we really supposed to be taking Vee seriously here? I know that some teenagers like to do blood vows and whatnot, but I don't think many actually think they will help with situations like that. Vee seems to actually think breaking a blood oath causes some Terrible Magical Effect. Really? Not to mention, Vee has never shown much interest in the occult, so her suddenly proposing this seems pretty out of left field.
- Going off of that, where the fuck did blood oaths suddenly come from? This is the first time we've ever heard anything like this! No, wait, I know. This is a clumsy attempt to introduce the concept of blood oaths into the mythology of this series. Those are going to be happening a lot in the next few books, and Fitzpatrick had to introduce them here because she hadn't thought it up for Hush, Hush.
Nora then proceeds to deliver a line that made me get over that stupidity, in favor of sheer horror.
“I wondered if I should tell her that being alone with Patch wasn’t always my choice. He moved like vapor. If he wanted alone time with me, he was going to get it. And though I hated to admit it, I didn’t always mind.”
- Yes, Nora, I'd say you should tell Vee. And the police. In fact, I'd spread the word far and wide what your boyfriend does, so everyone knows to chase him away if he seems to be stalking you more.
- Nora just OUTRIGHT ADMITTED that Patch can always track her down. No matter where she goes, he can break in if he wants to talk to her. There's no escape. There's no way she can get away from him. This is pure Nightmare Fuel, people!
- Possibly making it worse is that Nora is aware of this while somehow passing this off as something charming or quirky. Bella, at least, was generally oblivious to the honking huge hints that Edward was rummaging through her room while she slept and constantly monitoring every little thing she does. Nora knows Patch is doing this and just acts like she's talking about him leaving his old boxers lying around the house.
- “He wanted alone time with me.” Tell me that doesn't sound like every non/dub-con “romance” premise ever. Tell me that doesn't bring to mind Leon Petrides (warning if you read that sporking – that book is FULL of potential triggers). Tell me that doesn't make you think of tropes like I Have You Now, My Pretty. Tell me that doesn't sound like every bastard boyfriend and evil lover or husband character ever who dragged the heroine off by the arm while cackling that she was his and if he wanted her to fulfill her wifely duties with him, she'd certainly do so.
- A note to all aspiring writers – while some normally creepy things can be passed off as kinky fun if both parties consent, there are some things which are so choke-full of Do Not Want that hastily tacking “And she likes it, so it's cool” at the end won't help. Saying that your male lead will always break in to see his girlfriend if he wants to, regardless of her wishes, is one of those things.
Wow, I managed not to blow up. Amazing!
Vee continues to blather on about how blood oaths are “serious stuff” and she totally believes in it. When did she get into this sort of thing?! Why is she so convinced this is a foolproof method to keep away a stalker?!? What is WRONG with Vee???
Nora halts Vee in her search for a pocket knife by telling her that she has Marcie's diary. You know, the diary that she stole and we haven't heard of for the past two chapters or so. Vee instantly forgets about that pesky ex-boyfriend stalking her best friend, and instead begins to squee and beg to be allowed to read it. You know, if Marcie did something like that, Vee would scream about what an evil harpy she is. But if it's Marcie's diary being read, it's fine. I mean, she's a Mean Girl, so it's not like she has feelings!
Nora doesn't want to read the diary because that might involve learning something unsavory about Patch, which might lead to Nora never speaking to him again. Vee promptly channels us again and says that ditching Patch is a very good thing. Nora dithers and basically makes it clear that she doesn't want to cut out Patch entirely. Even though it was just a few chapters ago that she was determined that she would never see or even think of him again because otherwise he'd surely be sent to Hell.
At this point, I'm beginning to wonder if Fitzpatrick outlined several different plots and merged them together, like some sort of literary Frankenstein's monster. Because seriously, Nora had about five different sets of motivations going on here, they pretty much all negate one another, and the one being trotted out is usually in no way consistent with the last motivation she had.
In any case, Vee proceeds to give what may very well be the most self-aware counter to this entire series, and ought to be on the marching banner of antis for every contrived YA romance series like this one.
“There are other guys out there. Just so you know. There will never be a shortage of guys.”
ZeldaQueen: I know I won't say this often, but thank you, Vee. That is spot-on. There are other guys in the world. In fact, there are guys who wear baseball hats and ride motorcycles and make out with you against the wall who also don't invade your privacy and stalk you. It's really win, win here, Nora!
But of course, that doesn't get through to Nora at all. She agrees but privately feels that her answer is a “cheap lie”, because “There had never been a guy before Patch. How could I tell myself there’d be one after?”
ZeldaQueen: *pinches bridge of her nose* I'm pretty sure that what Fitzpatrick actually meant to convey was the idea that Patch is one-of-a-kind (let's ignore the fact that sleezeballs are a dime a dozen) and that Nora had no way of knowing if she'd ever meet someone as awesome as him later.
That's not what she wrote.
She just wrote Nora saying that she was clinging to Patch because he was a man and he was deigning to date her and if she got rid of him, she might never find another guy and how could she possibly survive then? She wrote Nora – a girl who's supposed to be clever and astute – buying into the idea that the one guy she dated at the tender age of sixteen is the only man she'll ever meet in her life. She wrote Nora refusing to cut ties with a guy who has stalked her, attempted to kill her, tricked her, and (she believes) robbed her and tried to kill her again, just because she's afraid of being alone and manless.
Do I even need to say why that's a horrible thing to insinuate? Yes, I know some people meet the loves of their lives in high school. But Patch and Nora's relationship is nothing like that, though. Even if we ignore the obvious abusive couple unfortunate implications, their relationship is far from being meaningful or deep. By Nora's own admittance, Patch hides things from her. Neither of them particularly trust the other. Nora seems to live in terror of being abandoned, even when there's no reason to think this.
Not to mention, this is just one more instance where the Hush, Hush canon contradicts itself. Nora's lamenting that she had no boyfriends before Patch? Maybe that's because the first book made it clear that she didn't want a boyfriend! That was the entire premise! Nora wasn't interested in dating, and instead wanted to focus on getting into a good college! She only began dating Patch after he began forcing himself into her life. There's absolutely nothing to suggest that Nora couldn't get another boyfriend. She's pretty and (ostensibly) intelligent and witty. I'm sure there are plenty of guys who would like to date a girl like that.
(Though I suspect this is why all men in the series who show an interest in Nora are portrayed as either murderous or sleazy or both. Which is different than Patch being murderous and sleazy because Shut Up, Reasons.)
And that infuriated me so much that I think a break is in order. See you in the second half of this chapter!
YOU FUCKING WHORE: 85
Onward to: Chapter 15 (Part 2)
Return to: Chapter 14 (Part 2)
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(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-26 03:36 am (UTC)...so says the girl who has been in a long term relationship since she was like sixteen. Before anyone calls me a hypocrite, in my defence, neither of us didn't go into the relationship expecting anything long term. It just sorta happened. Plus, with all the weird coincidences and mutual friends (I knew his best friend a whole year before I even met him) we had, I'm sure we would have met and dated eventually anyways. So there.
Vee is horrible. Period. I don't even know why she is even in this series.
And I actually think it's worst that Nora acknowledges Patch's creepy qualities and then completely ignores them. It's just...like Bella's obliviousness you could easily blame on being super sheltered. It like...I don't know. Nora's rejection of what is right in front of her gives me the shivers and reeks of 'the abused wife'.
Oh! I recall you wanted critiques on the new Sporking font. I don't mind it but is there a way to maybe use color to add a higher contrast between your recap and quotes? Trixie and I just use for our recaps. Totally works on LJ.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 12:25 am (UTC)That's an issue a lot of Suethors seem to run into. It was commented on the House of Night sporkings that the Cast ladies seemed to forget that they were writing about teenagers who were still growing and capable of changing. The same holds true for many fanfiction Suethors, who forget that Harry Potter, say, is supposed to be twelve and have him talk like he's twenty and build up a harem. In real life, Marcie's attitude towards dating would be perfectly normal. It's just here that it's treated as so horrible.
(Speaking of the Cast ladies, one of the things Kristin said that I agree with is that it's wrong to bash a girl or call her a slut because she dates more than one guy in her lifetime. Her using Zoey as an example is a pretty big broken aesop though, for many other reasons.)
XD And true, there are folks who meet their future spouses on first dates or in high school or whatever, but like you said, folks don't really PLAN for that sort of thing. And considering that NORA kept insisting that she did not want to date and only fell in "love" with Patch because he stalked her endlessly, it seems a tad hypocritical of her to bitch about Marcie's preferences.
The fourth book does try to justify Vee being in the story. It's an asspull of such epic proportions that I just stared and couldn't believe it actually happened AND I KNEW ABOUT IT AHEAD OF TIME.
I know what you mean. Another reviewer noted that Bella just sort of dreamily accepts being stalked by a vampire, but Nora starts out fully aware of how terrifying it is before she gives up. I think it's the awareness that makes it worse, since you can't take comfort in the thought that the character and Suethor were unaware of the implications. It'd be like if Belle from Beauty and the Beast was aware of what a scumbag Gaston was, then halfway through the movie thought, "Well, he's sexy and has a tragic backstory, so I love him."
Oh, I never thought of that! Do you mean make the quotes a different color, or the rest of the sporkings? I'll be sure to give it a try.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 01:04 am (UTC)I know it's always argued that books are fantasy and not real, blah blah, but these fantasies simply don't mesh with our morals nowadays, which is where the problem lies. Yeah, sure, they worked in the past but we aren't in the past anymore and women have really different expectations of themselves and their fellow woman now. I'm sorry to any romance writers out there but the genre really needs to grow up.
And considering that NORA kept insisting that she did not want to date and only fell in "love" with Patch because he stalked her endlessly, it seems a tad hypocritical of her to bitch about Marcie's preferences.
Man, and I fell for Tidus because he was nice to me and wrote me cheesy poems and ya know, was nice to me. No stalking involved.
There is a cold comfort with Bella and Meyer's stupidity. In the end, you just feel bad for how utterly stupid they are. With Nora, it's I who feels like the stupid one because I just wonder if I'm completely missing the point of a joke or something.
Oh, I never thought of that! Do you mean make the quotes a different color, or the rest of the sporkings? I'll be sure to give it a try.
Well, it's more your preference but I would go with the quotes because those are fewer and easier to HTML.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-26 04:51 am (UTC)And yet people still try to claim that she's not a rip-off of Bella Swan.
She will putter around, finally have something halfway interesting happen, and then completely forget about it by the next chapter.
She doesn't even have the excuse of this just being fanfiction with the names swapped out.
Anywho, Vee bitches about the lack of parking and then decides that it'll be fine to park in an employee's only parking lot.
And I bet the car doesn't get towed or ticketed.
At the very least, I know my sixteen-year-old self knew more than this!
I knew more than this at sixteen, and I've never even learned how to drive!
Vee figures that her car will blend right in, as “All these cars speak low class.”
Ana Steele's cluelessness about how the world works and Alice Cullen's snobbery.
This is the clueless teen dating a genuinely creepy guy and being unaware of it because oh look, he's hot and is a fantastic kisser!
I think it was the Fifty Shades Darker sporking where someone mentioned that sociopaths are skilled lovers.
Rixon has no probably
I think that should be "Rixon has no problem."
now we have Nora getting Vee to rub sun lotion on her back
I know this is a silly thing to point out with all the other crap in this book, but it was stupid of them to wait until they got to the beach to put sunscreen on. Sunscreen works much better if you put it on at least half an hour before you go to wherever you need it so it has time to absorb into the skin. Not only is it much more effective that way, but it will take longer to get washed off by sweat or ocean water. *gets off soapbox*
Vee naturally being obsessed with getting a tan to the point where she slathers baby oil on herself. How the HELL has she survived as long as she has?!
How has Fitzpatrick survived so long if she thinks that's a good idea?
Oh, and Vee contemplates if she can get away with tanning topless
I just had the most wonderful mental image of a cop leading Vee away for indecent exposure.
Fitzpatrick said that this was the first book she wrote using an outline to keep the plot in order. I'm seriously wondering how that worked out for her
I'm wondering how bad her other books must have been.
Now, we take all that and add in that apparently this whole time, Nora actually was worried about Patch's Freddy Krueger tendencies. AND SHE STILL WANTED TO RUN AWAY WITH THIS GUY. She still rolled her eyes when Vee said how much trouble he was! She still wept when it looked like he was interested in other girls. ALL OVER A GUY WHO, BY HER OWN ADMITTANCE, DID SOMETHING SHE CONSIDERED TOO WORRYSOME TO THINK ABOUT!!!
Wow. I think this might actually be worse than Bella still wanting Edward after finding out about his stalking and his murderous past.
ive
You left out the "g".
we're pretty obviously supposed to consider it Nora's fault that this happened, and not Patch's. Women are lustful, yo.
I can not be the only one flashing back to Chapter 15 of Eclipse and Fifty Shades of Grey in general.
EternalFae
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 12:33 am (UTC)It actually does, but it has no impact besides forcing a contrived scene to happen.
"I think it was the Fifty Shades Darker sporking where someone mentioned that sociopaths are skilled lovers."
I can buy that. Sociopaths are incredibly good at faking emotions and manipulating people.
"I'm wondering how bad her other books must have been."
Her only book before this was Hush, Hush. I think that was less of an incomprehensible mess only because it had fewer plots crammed together in it.
"Wow. I think this might actually be worse than Bella still wanting Edward after finding out about his stalking and his murderous past."
At least Edward did give SOME justification for what he did, even if Mervin did point out how terrible it still was. Nora gives no thoughts as to why Patch may have done these things.
"You left out the "g"."
Fixed, thanks! :D
"I can not be the only one flashing back to Chapter 15 of Eclipse and Fifty Shades of Grey in general."
It's uncanny, isn't it?
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 04:28 am (UTC)EternalFae
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 09:55 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-26 06:19 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 08:02 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 09:05 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 09:30 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 09:38 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-28 11:38 pm (UTC)So…it’s only acceptable to wear skimpy clothes if you’re doing it to impress your male significant other? Implying that if you’re doing it for yourself, that’s bad? Oh, yes, that’s not sexist at all. That doesn’t sound at all reminiscent of Christian’s attitude that Ana can wear skimpy clothes for him, but if she dares to wear them out in public where other men can see her? Burn the witch!
/I do not understand how people think Vee is a good friend/
There are people who think this? Why?! She’s one of the worst friends I’ve ever read about. She is every vile caricature of a female ‘friend’ that pops up in bad romance-comedies. As a matter of fact, Vee is the personification of what this series is: sleazy, shallow, ridiculous, man-obsessed, and stupid.
/Vee's big plans to take Nora out to lift her spirits boil down to, “I'll take out my heartbroken friend and help her get over her ex by making out with his best friend in front of her/
Because she’s a selfish twit who only cares about herself.
/It's not like we ever hear anything about Rixon worrying about impressing Vee or doing special things for her. No, Rixon is a Hot Guy, so he just has to show up and girls are instantly satisfied. It's up to them to pretty themselves up to his standards/
Oh, yes, and this type of fictional relationship drives me crazy. The women have to bend over backwards and forgive men their every failing, get their side of the story preached to them by a ‘friend’, get told over and over again that the guy’s a really decent person deep down, and they have to change for their men (usually by becoming ‘less uptight.’) But do the men ever have to see the women’s side of the story and change? Oh, no. They’re fine the way they are. The women are the ones who have to accommodate them. I’ve seen this relationship model in many romance-comedies and romance novels, and it's awful.
/“All these cars speak low class/
Yet Marcie and her family are supposed to be the upper-class snobs. Tell me again, Nora, why you hang out with Vee but not Marcie? I really don’t see the difference between your image of Marcie and the reality of who Vee is.
/tell Nora off for not sounding happy about Rixon showing up/
Yes, how dare she be unhappy about something that you decided for her without asking her first. Is this a case of narcissism or stupidity?
/finds it “lame” that her boyfriend is possibly tangled in something dangerous and illegal, along with a guy who she thinks murdered someone/
Or is this supposed to be funny? Are we supposed to be laughing at Vee’s ignorance and shallowness (“oh, ha, ha, she doesn’t know the truth about Rixon; oh, ha, ha, she’s so boy-crazy”)? Because I’m not laughing, Ms. Fitzpatrick. Vee is supposed to be Nora’s best friend, not a waste of space.
/Vee actually marches over to a woman and her children and tries to get Nora to tell them what Patch does for a living/
Okay…I’m seriously wondering if Vee has some sort of personality disorder. Because this is not normal. She’s a bratty six-year-old stuck in a teenager’s body with a teenager’s libido.
Honestly, one of the most frustrating things about having to read Vee’s words and actions is that it all seems so fake. None of what she says or does comes across as realistic in any shape or form.
/“I didn’t want to even think about what it meant that he now seemed capable of inserting himself into my dreams/
Oh, like Freddy Krueger? Yes, what a heartthrob that man is…
/there are some things which are so choke-full of Do Not Want that hastily tacking “And she likes it, so it's cool” at the end won't help. Saying that your male lead will always break in to see his girlfriend if he wants to, regardless of her wishes, is one of those things./
Because it doesn’t matter if she wants it. The problem is that he doesn’t care if she wants it. The problem is when you make it clear that even if she didn’t want it, he’d still do it. Oh, Nora doesn’t mind that he stalks her in her sleep? Well, good for her. It’s not like Patch would've cared if she did.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-29 08:20 pm (UTC)Making it even worse, remember how Hush, Hush had Patch wipe off Nora's lip gloss, tell her that she looked better without it, and then a fuss was made about how Nora wore no make-up when she was going out and thought she might run into Patch? Yeah.
"There are people who think this? Why?! She’s one of the worst friends I’ve ever read about. She is every vile caricature of a female ‘friend’ that pops up in bad romance-comedies. As a matter of fact, Vee is the personification of what this series is: sleazy, shallow, ridiculous, man-obsessed, and stupid."
I've seen fans call Vee "fun" and think she's hilarious. Really. Fitzpatrick said in an interview that "you either love Vee or you hate her" and thought she was a very authentic 16-year-old girl. Really.
"Yet Marcie and her family are supposed to be the upper-class snobs. Tell me again, Nora, why you hang out with Vee but not Marcie? I really don’t see the difference between your image of Marcie and the reality of who Vee is."
I think Vee's supposed to be middle class and Nora used to be (from what's said, she and her mom struggle financially because they have a big house and Nora's dad is no longer able to contribute to the income). And as for the images, it gets even worse later, when we find out that Nora and her mom apparently would regularly mock the Miller family for being overly materialistic and conspicuous with their money. You know, like how they WEREN'T, throughout the series.
"Yes, how dare she be unhappy about something that you decided for her without asking her first. Is this a case of narcissism or stupidity?"
The latter, I think.
"Or is this supposed to be funny? Are we supposed to be laughing at Vee’s ignorance and shallowness (“oh, ha, ha, she doesn’t know the truth about Rixon; oh, ha, ha, she’s so boy-crazy”)? Because I’m not laughing, Ms. Fitzpatrick. Vee is supposed to be Nora’s best friend, not a waste of space."
I...honestly don't know WHAT the point of that part was. Nora genuinely is pissed by it, and it reads like she's angry at being forced to confront a potentially unpleasant truth. Given that the story has been lobbing hints that Patch is someone for Nora to be afraid of (which we already knew, Nora has yet to figure out, and will be proven wrong by the story's end), I actually think we're supposed to take Vee's warnings about Patch seriously, and that she's exaggerating stuff because that's how her character is. Or something, I don't know.
(no subject)
Date: 2014-03-30 03:47 am (UTC)