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ZeldaQueen: Good news, everyone! After a long, insane trek, we are nearly finished with this horrible wank-fest! Just ten chapters left! Once again, I shall be playing Kate and Link, who can't seem to catch a break, will be playing Barbossa

Link: *examining himself in costume* Do you think the Props Department will notice if I stole this hat? It's really nice!

ZeldaQueen: Personally, I like your green one better

Link: That's because you never wore it when it was a really annoying and chatty wizard. The negative memory association, I'll tell you...

ZeldaQueen: Well, let's talk about that after this performance


THE CURTAINS RISE FOR...

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Chapter 20

Kate: Here we are, just two days away from Shipwreck Cove. I happen to know that Beckett is planning to invade, because I'm awesome like that. Fortunately, I'm armed with a dead herring and will begin to beat the readers with how the pirates will all surely fight to the death for their freedom and never, ever let Beckett win. Isn't this much better than Stephenie Meyer's writing? She wishes she had dead herrings like this! I mean, total dead herring envy!

Barbossa: My eyes are intent. Are you sure you want to go to Shipwreck Cove?

Kate: I don't see why not. I'm one of the nine pirate lords, after all, seeing as Gethesemane wrote out Elizabeth being named as Sao Feng's successor

Barbossa: Yeah, but are you really, really, sure?

Kate: Um, yeah. My public needs me, after all

Barbossa: I mean really, really, reeeeeeeeeeally -

Kate: What are you getting at? And why are you so nervous? I'm so bothered by how uncharacteristic it is, that I must spell "uncharacteristic" incorrectly

Barbossa: Well...it's just "
that gypsy". You know, Calypso? Even though she's technically not  a gypsy and I'm not even sure that a pirate in the Caribbean waters in this time period would know the term "gypsy" -

Kate: Yeah, I know. She wants to kill me when she's released. I guess she wants the satisfaction of having the official title of "Sea Goddess", because it's really not explained why she doesn't just use her magic to kill me now, but whatever

Barbossa: That's it. I don't want you to join us at the meeting because we need all nine Lords to agree. I guess I just can't refuse to release her, since she's apparently weak enough in human form to be locked up and killed or whatever, but Gethesemane must remind her readers how I'm now whipped into only worrying about you

Kate: Oh, don't worry. There's no way I'd let a canon female dare to become more powerful than me. I'm going to just steal Elizabeth and Jack's idea and urge the Brethren Court to fight Beckett

Barbossa: Worthy cause, but you've got other reasons, right? I mean, it's not like you've done anything else in this fic purely out of altruism - erm, I mean, I have a feeling

Kate: Bluh what? No, no, certainly not! I have no ulterior motives, and it's certainly not because I am now in love with Davy Jones and want to free him from the dreadful bonds of canon, nope! There's nothing between us, nothing at all!

Barbossa: Whatever. You two totally have the hots for each other

Kate: Not at all! If I murder his canon love interest though, it'll...free him from his curse. Yeah. That's how Gethesemane's justifying it, anyway. So I'm going to do that. It really makes me look brave and heroic and certainly not like an insane yandere like Alex Forrest. Anyway, I've almost gone for the entire chapter without wangsting about my pregnancy, so I'll just do that now

Barbossa: Huh, I figured you were pregnant. Apparently was the only on. "
At least we know it's Jack's", because after all, pirates are notorious for being faithful lovers

Kate: "
At least I've done one thing right"

Barbossa: Allow me to brush aside your token acceptance of your mistakes to disagree. "
You don't know how many lives you've saved, or how many you will save as a consequence of fighting for the freedom of every man who calls himself pirate. Your father would be proud of ye, that much is certain". Or, you know, I'm sure he would be if he wasn't busy being in At Stranger Tides. Anyway, I've pretty much replaced Will and Elizabeth entirely, so good on you *walks off, leaving the Sue alone with her thoughts, so quite alone*
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Onward to: Chapter 21

Back to: Chapter 19

Return to: Table of Contents

(no subject)

Date: 2011-05-24 03:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] arynia.livejournal.com
...Is something going to happen soon? Don't get me wrong, your sporking is hilarious, but...seeing as Gethsemane is determined to be rid of any of the awesomeness that comes with Calypso, Will and Elizabeth, is she actually intending to do anything to make up for it?

(no subject)

Date: 2011-05-25 01:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zelda-queen.livejournal.com
Yes, something is going to happen soon. Yes, Will and Elizabeth will not be present and Calypso will be hugely Scary. Thankfully the fic will be over not long after.

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