The Legend Of Rah And The Muggles: Chapter Ten - The Manchineet Tree

[zelda_queen]

ZeldaQueen: This is just ridiculous. Even more so than before. I'll tell you all, I was laughing like a hyena when I read this.

Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter Ten: The Manchineet Tree

Well what do you know? This chapter kicks us in the head, first sentence, with how Zyn was now a "loud and nasty" young man. The Muggles apparently are naive and have no freaking clue why he's like this. Jesus folks, maybe it's because you're giving his brother all of the attention? But naturally it's just that Zyn is a Bad Person and the poor little Muggles are just so confused as to why on earth Zyn is so badly behaved. Nona especially is upset and insists that she gave Rah and Zyn the same amount of love while raising them. If the previous chapters have been any indication, I find the accuracy of that statement to be highly suspect. Yur is a doddering old fool who insists that it's not anyone's fault that the kid is acting like this and that this is all caused by "what Zyn is not giving himself". What? Hello people, he's depressed! Yes his problem is partially caused by his lack of self esteem and the like, but why do you think he got the problem to begin with? If someone is as screwed up as he seems to be, you can't just go "Oh well, they'll have to fix themselves up" and ignore it! Augh!

We're then told that Zyn has a number of Muggles who ally themselves with him, originally because they felt he needed them, but now are basically battered into submission. No, really.

"Zyn's constant abuse beat them into submission. He owned their spirits, and their individual identities were as he decided they would be. They did whatever he told them to, at whatever time, whenever he told them to do it"

ZeldaQueen: Because of course Zyn is Just So Evil that the only way anyone could possibly hang around and support him is if they were abused into submission. Stouffer? This is not believable. That's not even bringing up the plot hole of why the heck the friends and families of these abused Muggles are just standing by and letting this happen. Or why Rah isn't doing anything. Seriously, it's one thing to say "My brother's mopey, I'll leave him to sort it out". It's another to just stand around while your brother is abusing a group of people who are smaller and weaker than him into submission.

Oh, and we're told that this group of put-upon Muggles that Zyn controls is called "Nevils". This, incidentally, is another one of the "plagiarism" things - these Nevils and Neville Longbottom from Harry Potter. I guess that's ignoring the fact that the names are spelled differently, used differently (one as a given name and one as a name for a group), and that Rowling picked a French name that predated Stouffer's works by a good many years. I guess it's only to be expected though. By her own admittance, Stouffer only quickly scanned through the first book and the lawsuit notes apparently have down that Neville Longbottom is "half-muggle". Yes, really.

Anyway, to prove how Evil and Horrible Zyn has become, Stouffer shows us how he yells at a Muggle named Teeter, who is the Keeper of the Aviary, because Zyn hates how much the birds are chirping and want them to be shut up. It's a good thing my Suspension of Disbelief Chord is made of elastic, because man alive is it getting stretched. I don't think Stouffer knows how sibling rivalry goes.

We're introduced to an albino hawk named Seymour, who for some reason is brought up with his name in quotes, as if that's allegedly his name or something. Maybe he's the Hawk formerly known as Seymour. I don't know. Anyway, Seymour asks why Teeter lets Zyn push him around and Teeter starts going on about how Seymour talks tough because he's safe in a tree. This is just...this is really freaking stupid. Zyn and now Teeter are talking like stereotypical "tough" guys or something and Stouffer's doing a lousy job at it. She had more success with Buddy the Barricuda. Seymour comments on how "[t]his nastiness is spreading like a bad disease" which is hilarious because the "nastiness" in the conversation thus far has been rather lame (including Teeter calling Seymour "you big fluff of nothing"). Seriously, this is like a bad version of the Smurfs or something.

Teeter actually tries to enforce Zyn's "no bird singing" request by hanging a sign that says, no fooling, that there is to be no singing after eleven o'clock or "Violators will pay with their lives!" Zyn is pleased by this and tells Teeter that it's a good thing he got the problem taken care of "or [he] might have had a few of [his] own - get the message?" (see what I mean about the stupid "gangster" dialogue?) Teeter basically says it's all cool, whilst pulling his pants above his waistline. Oh gods, not the waistline! Apparently Stouffer's idea of how stereotypical 'hoods dress is in inverse proportion to how they are now.

 By the way, at the risk of being repetitive, I really hate how Zyn is talking. Actual quote, "Yeah, I got him right where I want him, oh, yes I do, diddy do - do!" Gag me!

We're given a Robot Roll Call of the six other Nevils besides Teeter. First is Jiitters (spelled that way, and I'm not sure if it's on purpose or not), who has a problem with his hands shaking when his conscience bothered him "and lately they shook all of the time", just in case we hadn't figured out that the Nevils were all Horrible and Nasty yet (though I have yet to see anything that portrays them as actually villainous).

Then we have Chops, a fifteen year old who chews gum and pops the bubbles with his fingers, the horror! Wait, they have gum in Aura? He also wears a black leather jacket with C.H.O.P.S on the back. We're told that his real name is Peter (so much for the "colorful" Muggle names from before) but "[e]veryone also knows that it isn't a good idea to ever call him Peter, not if they knew what is good for them". I'll leave you all to bang your heads over that. I think I'll concuss myself if I do any more head desking.

Fraidy is next, and he is the seventeen-year-old stereotypical geek Muggle. He's apparently always biting his nails and wears huge sunglasses, which apparently now exist in Aura. Sure, why the heck not?

Stubby is also a member of the gang, and you might remember him from before, as the Muggle kid who could talk at age five (which Muggles weren't supposed to be able to do) and asked a lot of questions. We're told that he's known for "jumping up and down behind other Nevils in front of him"...good for him. We're also reminded of his love of asking questions and how he yanks on the clothes of people if they ignore him, to the point of sometimes tearing the clothes. And he's supposed to be fifteen? Incidentally, according to this in-depth review, this chapter is supposed to take place twenty-two years after the children washed up on Aura. Stubby was five then. So apparently he ages slower than anyone else or fell in a time warp or something.

Next on the list is eighteen-year-old Boggs, so named because he is always dirty and smells like a swamp. Apparently this has gone on since childhood, when he got his name. Maybe he's this book's evil version of Pigpen, I don't know. His clothes are also always covered in green mold and in shreds and he mostly grunts. (Look folks, I'm just sporking this thing, alright?)

And lastly, we have the fourteen-year-old Patch, who always has a "'whatever'" attitude. Apparently he is "totally carefree" and does anything and everything, not because he's a thrill seeker, but because he doesn't care. Alright then.

Stouffer informs us that the Nevils are "terrorists" and are so threatening that even the Greeblies are uneasy around them. What, they scare off the rat-things? They must be terrifying!

Seriously though, terrorists? Really? And we are never actually shown that they do anything! They never blow anything up, they never attack anyone, and they never steal or occupy anything or any place. This is just stupid!



ZeldaQueen: Muggle terrorists! Silence! They kill you!

In all seriousness though, folks, this is just dumb. I mean, I know it was before, but this cranks it up to eleven. It's like Stouffer suddenly started retelling West Side Story, but in fairy tale terms. She talks about how Zyn and the Nevils are "terrorists" but then says that their actions are "nasty pranks". Well...I guess that's one way to describe terrorist activity...

We're also told that even though Rah sustains several injuries from their wrongdoings, he is not afraid of any of them. Okay, fair enough. *raises hand* Oh Stouffer! Question! If Rah is so clever and big and strong, why isn't he doing anything to stop this behavior? Why isn't anyone doing anything to stop this? According to the text, pretty much every Muggle is attacked by this group, right? So why don't they do something? At the very least, because it's their youth who are getting screwed up! Are they just sitting around, letting the hooligans do whatever they want? And Rah too? If so, to heck with them all, they're clearly too dumb to live!

And that goes double for the "bad-boy Nevils and Zyn", as we find out shortly. They all have made their hideout/home in a tree called a "Manchineet Tree", which is next to a place called "Seven Secret Swamp". This is all well and good, until you take into minor account that the tree is freaking radioactive. Or rather, it sheds radioactive pollen. And these folks just keep living in there, acting like it's an inconvenience! And it's not like this is another one of Stouffer's blunders, where the radioactivity has no effects on them. Oh no, it actually screws with their health. Their skin goes discolored, their nails turn "thick and crusty", and their eyes turn yellow and bloodshot. We also learn how Zyn's hair falls out in clumps along with his eyelashes and all in all he is very ill. The only explanation we get as to why they don't just camp out in the woods or something rather than stay in the stupid tree is that they've all turned lazy. Um, no. Lazy is not wanting to get off of the sofa to get the remote. Not wanting to move out of a radioactive tree is just having a death wish.

And yes, I'm well aware of how stupid the concept of a radioactive tree is anyway. I think that goes without saying.

We're also told that Zyn point-blank refuses to swallow his pride and ask the Muggles or Rah for help, which actually makes some sort of sense. After how everyone has basically given Rah so much attention and only ever scolded him and made no effort to help him out, I find it completely believable that he wouldn't want to go to them for help. I'm still seeing no terrorist evidence though, so yeah. Stouffer still sees fit to whack us over the head with how Evil and Horrible Zyn is, by having him basically tell the Nevils to suck it up and continue living in the radioactive tree until he figures things out.

Meanwhile, Rah the Sainted is agonizing over what on earth went wrong with Zyn and what he could have done to prevent it. Maybe if you had a talk with him, this wouldn't have happened! And still, no one gets it! Instead, Yur just tells Rah "all questions aren't answered in a day, Rah. Just give it some time". I...what? This makes no sense! According to Stouffer, Zyn and his mooks are wandering around hurting people and they're just acting like he ran away from home in the middle of the night! Don't they care that there's a group of their children out, hurt and sad and sick and engaging in violent behavior?

*sigh* Moving on, Rah reads from The Ancient Book of Tales, "The Year Of The Rabbits". This is just a weird tale. I mean, the story itself isn't so bad (and I actually think it was used in a chapter of Pet Shop of Horrors), but it's like the one with the gilded cages - I just have no idea how it relates to the actual events. The story itself is, of course, about rabbits, specifically vicious little devils who continue to consume their food supplies until everyone else is starving. As a result, the rabbits began to multiply like crazy until there wasn't enough food for them all and they began to starve. Rabbits were now the most plentiful food source on Aura, which meant that they were now what was being served up for dinner. Rabbits became the prime food supply for the people of Aura for some time and the rabbits learned that to be too greedy could lead to extinction.

Oh, I feel I ought to point out one particular point of fail in that story - according to Stouffer's website and the character glossary in the back of this book, Muggles are vegetarians. So they're eating rabbits in this story...why?

Anyway, story finished, Rah starts to fall to sleep and is thinking of his birth mother the entire time. He starts wishing that she were there and that he needed her. Sorry kid, your mother was too busy flirting with the butler to take care of you. Oh, and we're reminded of a key on a chain which Rah has had since he washed up on Aura, which he is certain his mother left him and which he has no idea what it unlocks. I feel I ought to add that this was in fact mentioned in the first chapter, but I think I forgot because I was too busy trying to figure out why Lady Catherine felt it was absolutely necessary to send her babies into the freaking ocean.

And the page turned and the Yoshi grew happier.

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Onward to: Chapter Eleven: The Big Plan

Back to: Chapter Nine: An Attitude

Back to: Table of Contents

Comments

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

So what you are telling me, and correct me if I'm wrong, is that when faced with a crisis our brave hero (over twenty at this time) decides that the best course of action is to lie down and cry for mommy, who he has never met and didn't need to since he grew up in a loving home?

... ... ... Ok, that's it. I officially gave up on this character. Dude, Hope from FF13 has more balls than you, and he's 12 and saw his mother die!

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's pretty much how it went. I'm sure Stouffer was trying to make it that Zyn was going down a self-destructive path and Rah was powerless to stop it, but DUDE! Your brother is COMMITTING CRIMES AND ATTACKING PEOPLE! He's beating Muggles into submission to obey him! DO SOMETHING!!!

And we're supposed to feel bad when Zyn goes against him later?

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

I just don't know. I may buy his from a kid, but he's an adult already. This just makes him the biggest wimp ever. Hit girl (also 12) should just spare him the misery and kill him.

I can't blame Zyn for going against him. He's got the most embarrassing sibling ever. Already crying and Zyb has done nothing extremely bad. At worst he's being a brain dead brat (of all the places to live, I swear!) But at least he's being proactive.

M brain can't just get around that reaction. What would his mother do? Put them on a boat alone without food or water, leaving them merciless to the sun. That woman was not bright...

[madamchaos.livejournal.com]

Dude, Hope from FF13 has more balls than you, and he's 12 and saw his mother die!

...wooooow. I mean, I agree with this sentiment and all, but that's a pretty low blow. I just started 13 and have been complaining basically the entire time thus far about how much of a whiny bitch Hope is. Because he's such a whiny bitch.

And yet Rah is even worse. I completely agree that he is. Yeesh, these people...


On another note, I... very distinctly remember the Petshop of Horrors story. It was one of the four that they turned into an anime episode, and it was horrifying. Fast-reproducing flesh-eating demon rabbits... *shivers*

Dunno what that has to do with what's going on here. Other than being a far superior story, anyway.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

What is this FF13 story, btw? If this Hope person is so hopeless...

"Dunno what that has to do with what's going on here. Other than being a far superior story, anyway."

Oh, what I meant was that they both shared the concept of there being the rapid and huge overpopulation of rabbits. D also mentions (in the manga at least) that when every bit of food is gone and the rabbits have nothing left to eat, they'll eat each other.

It's kind of weird, because that IS how populations work in nature and all and I'm kind of shocked that Stouffer would get that straight (and if you think I'm giving her too little credit...just wait until next chapter. Just wait).

[madamchaos.livejournal.com]

Oh, no, I meant I have no idea what her rabbit story has to do with anything. Then again, that caged birds story didn't seem to have anything to do with it, so I dunno...

I just started the game, and this one really throws you into things in medias res, so everything thus far has basically been trying to explain what's going on. The character of Hope, however... well.

Mercy, he doesn't seem to be the focus character, but my god, this kid. You're introduced to him when The Resistance is handing out weapons to civilians to give them a fighting chance, and this kid pulls away from the gun like it's going to bite him or something. His MOTHER (who I wish was on your party because for the two minutes she's around she is badass) gets up, takes the gun, and says "Moms are tough" before throwing herself right into the firefight. Hope and the rest of the refugees who don't have weapons are taken out of range of the fighting.

Things go south pretty quickly, though, and after shooting the ever-loving CRAP out of something that was about to kill everybody, Mom says her quick iconic line again ("I told you, moms are tough") before something explodes behind her and she dies without any blood loss (then again, it was the concussive force rather than physical shrapnel, so she probably sustained heavy internal damage). Hope is standing in the just perfect spot to witness this, and has a total spazz attack-- which I can't blame him for. His mom did just die, and apparently he has Daddy Issues, so she was the only family he considered.

What gets me is that, after this happens, he gets all pissed that somehow Snow couldn't save his mom (even though like 80% of everybody who was fighting kind of DIED and you really thought this one guy who PUNCHES ROBOTS was going to be able to save everybody?), and vows to get revenge by... talking to him about it. Which I'm also fine with, but event conspire so that Snow has to take off on a hovercycle to infiltrate a building before Hope can talk to him.

Hope is then promptly convinced by a girl he literally just met to steal another hovercycle and crash into the building, where he promptly begins to WHINE HIS LITTLE BITCHY HEART OUT as the girl takes party lead; all the while you're wandering around, and he's just saying thins like "Do you know where you're going?" "Are we lost?" "Haven't we been here before?" and seriously kid STFU because what are the chances that this little girl has been inside of this apparently extremely dangerous and well-guarded sanctum all right?

He has a few more breakdowns and tries to run away from danger, but what got me is that, after some bad stuff goes down, he turns on Snow and just begins screaming "Why did this happen to me! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Like Snow told him to steal a hovercycle, crash into a building, and follow him into the aforementioned EXTREMELY DANGEROUS PLACE.

And then, when some other characters get him alone, he just keeps up the whining and tells her all about how his daddy never loved him and how he was just on vacation and it's all so unfair and baaaaw. In all fairness, though, she does get fed up with him and just ditch him immediately afterward, so.

The point of all this being that however much I want to punch this kid in the face for projecting all of his problems onto people who have no idea why he's so pissed off (because the kid still hasn't gotten around to telling Snow what's eating him), he at least had the stones to steal that hovercycle and crash through that wall and almost maybe possibly but just barely not talk about it.

Unlike Rah, who basically says "Something is terribly wrong. Not my problem."

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

Right. ^^; The only thing I can possibly conclude is that the moral is about the dangers of being greedy. Except...Zyn and his crew are jealous and angry, not greedy. -_-;

Oh wow. O_o That sounds...grating. But you're right, at least that kid actually did stuff, rather than sit around boo-hooing. And Stouffer thought that Rowling plagiarized this for Harry Potter? Harry's got a million times more balls than this kid does! He was saving the Sorceror's Stone when Rah was learning to SPELL *HIS NAME*!!!

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

XD Thanks.

YES!!! BATTLEFIELD EAAAAARRRTH!!!! D:

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

Hah, you got something wrong. Vanille was pushing him into doing it for her own reasons (don't know if I should spoil). But it's obvious she was egging him on.

While I LOVED his mom, I knew she was dead the moment she grabbed that gun. I checked the manual and saw that Hope was a playabled character, turned to my little brother and said "$20 bucks she dies, the kids sees her die, and it will somehow look like it was the big guy's fault for maximum angst." And what happened? XD

Those first few hours of playing were painful for me. When it was Vanille and Hope I would pray for somebody else to show up, then it would be Snow being a reckless ass and I would pray for somebody else, and then I get Sazch being the token "annoying black man" with Light, the blandest protagonist ever, and I would groan because there was nobody else to play.

I just kept playing because:

a) I wanted to understand the story (I still not fully understand it, but I get enough)

b) It's pretty. Shallow, I know, but this has the best graphics out of my game library. Even if Tales of Vesperia has a more engaging story with fun characters and moments I actually laugh.

c) I actually enjoy the music of this game. There are moments I want everybody to just shut up and let me hear the score instead.

d) The "leveling up" reminds me of FF10 mixed with FF10-2. I liked the idea of both, so I enjoy it now. The battles are more dynamic than in previous games (although, again, Vesperia is way more dynamic)


But yeah, as I said in the other post, the lot does get better. It just takes around CD and a half out of three to get there. XD

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

Sorry, I misread the whole Van/Hope thing. Still, I'm not sure if it is because I'm so ahead from you, but you got Hope's reason for hating Snow a little wrong. Should I explain why I say this? Would hate to spoil anything by accudent.

[madamchaos.livejournal.com]

I probably got his reasoning a little wrong because I was writing at 2.30am and very tired. >.>

No need, though; I've played significantly farther into the game (up to chapter ten). Hope is... better for me, now, but I still refuse to have him on my party because he spent the first, what...? Seven chapters or so, constantly going on and on about how 'words won't change anything' and how 'getting revenge is pointless' and then he STILL turns around and tries to kill Snow because the poor bastard just has no idea what the kid's so pissy about.

I mean, maybe if he had thought that it would be worthwhile, or give him closure or something, I would have accepted his reasoning a little bit easier. He's just a kid, after all, so if he'd been in the throes of pre-adolescent angst and just thought that maybe he'd be able to get revenge for his mother (who totally made her own decision to protect her son and in the process got killed in an attack that also killed a ton of other people at the same time), so I could understand where he was coming from, once he maybe calmed down a bit and wasn't so shrill about it. But he constantly admits that he knows what he's doing is pointless, and then he just goes on and... does it anyway.

But he did a LOT ballsier as things went on. I might have wanted to punch him in the face several times, but at least he picked up a weapon and started beating things with it, and I can respect that he shifted from being the cowering boy who blamed somebody else for his troubles to a kid who was willing to cut down monsters... who blamed somebody else for his troubles. And once he stopped with the pointless revenge thing... actually he hasn't really talked much since then. Maybe that's why he grew on me. ^_^

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

His problem with Snow is Snow himself. (Which really shows just before they go to Hope's home and they're alone) He comes in as a leader, talking about freeing people and fighting, which convinces the group to fight. That is all good. Yet when Snow sees his moher die, what does he sees next? Snow standing up smiling, like things are still cool. So Hope is "WTF?! People just died under your leadership! Can you feel a bit sorry?!" But Snow, being the reckless ass that he is, feels no remorse (as a defense mechanism)> Then they meet and what is Snow concerned about? Saving Serah, that is a L'Ciel. Yes, we get the meaning behind that, but Hope doesn't. As far as he knows Snow used his mother to cut a path to save what is pretty much a "demon" in his world. (Not the right word, but you get what I mean).

His beef with Snow is not his mother fighting, is his attitude for the fact people died. I recognized this problem before hand so when they're alone and Snow is speaking... my lord I wanted to stab him myself. I don't remember the exact quote, but he basically tells Hope "Those who die are loser" ... argh! I was glaring at him with Hope.

And I liked that vacillation as the game went on because vengeance is not what Hope was after. He wants validation that his mother death was worth something. Seeing Snow treat it with a smile affects his view. Add the fact that he feels lost and alone and considered a demon hunted down by the army, and I'm glad the kid is not being Shinji Ikari.

Also, his hatred drove him to fight Lightning style, but planning to kill somebody is not easy. In a way it was a reflection of who Lightning was and how she was handling things (Which led to the big sister/ little brother relationship). Lightning killing the Sanctum was not going to bring Serah back, but what could she do? She let those feelings cloud her and is via Hope that she understands that and even cares again about something and (As said by herself) starts feeling Hope and wants hope to feel hope too.

And then Snow, confronted by his own recklessness, goes through a BSOD and seeing it like that makes him understand who Snow is. The idiot is actually sorry and that satisfy him. It's not that he wanted Snow to kill himself or be emo, is for him to recognize the sacrifices made. Seeing that it is so, he stands to fight the monster and comes to appreciate having Snow. He grows up and comes to accept things as is.

What I never got is his beef with his dad. That was a big WTF?! for me. Isn't his dad awesome? And I loved his interaction with his dad, which made me question why was he so against it in the first place. Game, explain! (That's the only thing Hope related that bugs me)

Plus he's the best medic and an awesome ravager vs Vanille.

But for each their own. I mean, I can't stand Vanille. Made worst with the fact she's not a very good medic (at least in my game). I'm dying and a third character, and she cast cure to the other character and I die. You twat, cast Cura dammit! Why did I bother teaching you that?!

But hey, isn't Sazch made of awesome. He starts so annoying! But by the end of the second CD I wanted to hug him so bad. He's my favorite character in that game.

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

Dude, everyone in FF13 starts off annoying:

Sazch is basically the "annoying black guy" personality to the point I called him Chris Tuker for that first part of the game.

Light was so bland! She fights an... there's nothing else really. (At east she didn't angst like other FF heroes)

Vanille.... I wanted to smack her. So giggly and hyper to the point it was not cute to me.

Hope was Tidus from FF10. He even has the daddy doesn't love me complex for a while (And the you meet his dad and he's awesome. I had to stop for a moment and say "WTF?!" game)

And Snow... God, I was happy every time somebody punched him.

And yet everyone, in my opinion, gets better as they go along. Right now Hope is one of my favorites since he ditched the whining, got over his "SNOW killed my mom!!" complex, daddy issues are out the window and the kid has toughen up (Plus he's my designated healer. Plus he has this adorable thing going on with Light where they act like loving siblings with each other. It just takes time to get there.

[madamchaos.livejournal.com]

Hah hah, I know. Although I actually started off with an affinity toward Sazh and Snow. The former because he actually has a personality, I tend to wind up rooting for the comic relief anyway, and once I figured out he was a father (before the game blatantly says "Oh, yeah, I got a little boy, too") I just felt bad for him. Snow, pretty much exclusively because he's voiced by the guy who did Kanji Tatsumi from Persona 4, and because he was punching robots. He kind of fell out of favor for me over time, but I think that's because he spends about half the game either chipping his girlfriend out of the crystal or stuck on an airship; his only character defining moments are right at the beginning of the game, and right around the time Hope tries to stab him.

I had the oddest feeling that Hope's daddy issues would turn out to be one of two things: either his father was a big bad (Mom and I were joking about him being the Pope- sorry, Primarch, very early on), or his father was awesome and he was just a whiny bitch. I was hoping for the latter, and I was not disappointed.

[shaolina.livejournal.com]

Sazch is the best! He's the sweetest, coolest character in that game. When he points his gun at Vanille I was "Yes, shoot the twat!" but then he's so awesome and says something around the lines of "There are a few unforgivable things in this world. Shooting a child is one of the." Dude, I wanted to hug him right there. That whole chapter made me love that guy so much.

I never liked Snow. (Although I'll admit punching robots is freaking awesome!! And he's the best Sentinel.) He was a reckless ass. Not evil or mean, but just too irresponsible and self absorbed to notice what he was doing. Plus loud and obnoxious too. When he's alone with Hope I kept trying to have Hope stab him in the back or something. Every thing in that part was him shoving his foot deeper into his mouth to the point I was cringing.


In other news: Persona 4 = awesomeness. That and the tales series are my current favorite series.

[southerngaelic.livejournal.com]

Oh wow. This is just PRECIOUS. Zyn, who's been jealous and neglected since childhood, has taken natural steps to becoming an Evil Overlord and now has the makings of a juvenile/future Minion squad. And none of these supposed good guys can think why this is happening. Maybe the fact that he'd rather live in a radioactive tree than be around you assholes should say something!

Stouffer, you're a joke. *flips her off*

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

I swear, I do believe this Suethor and her characters are all infinitely more idiotic than Meyer and Co. Jacob put forth more effort to connect to Leah, for heaven's sake!

[kawaiicow.livejournal.com]

This chapter is stupid, the characters are stupid and the author is stupid. The only believeable character here is Zyn, despite the stupid things Stouffer makes him say.

No wait, I know what this reminds me of. It reminds me of a Criminal Minds episode where the attitudes of a small town make separates some kid from his sister and he then comes back for a roaring rampage of revenge. Except the Muggles here are less sympathetic than the townspeople.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

I know, Zyn's the only one here I feel sorry for. Maybe if everyone else stopped whining and *did* something, but no! Oy...

[aikaterini.livejournal.com]

You could be generous and say that since the Muggles have had no previous experience with raising human children, they weren't the best-equipped to deal with raising Zyn and Rah. However, that point becomes moot when you realize that they have their own children, who are not that different from the twins except in appearance. You're telling me that none of the Muggle children ever experienced sibling rivalry or became jealous? The Muggles are so stupidly oblivious here that it's ridiculous! And the fact that their oh-so-strong and wonderful savior, Rah, doesn't do anything to help his brother, not even when his brother is beating other people up and forming a gang, makes the situation even worse.

And why is Rah thinking about his mother *now* and why not his father, also? At least in "Star Wars," Luke had a vague idea of what his father was like to idolize and emulate, even though he'd grown up without him. Here it doesn't make sense, because none of the Muggles knew Rah's mother, so none of them could have told him about her, and we've received no indication that Rah has ever thought about her before, whereas Luke had constantly dreamed about his father and had actively asked people about him.

And now Zyn is losing his hair? *weeps* You know, since you raised the point of Stouffer suing Rowling about Neville (even though it's not an uncommon name for British boys - one of Britain's very own prime ministers was named Neville!), did Stouffer also sue Rowling about Voldemort? Think about it, Tom Riddle used to be handsome, but he was secretly Evil and then became an ugly, hairless monster who formed the Death Eaters, who actually *are* a gang of terrorists. Does Zyn create a new name for himself by using an anagram? Does he later call himself Nyz? ;)

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

I have no idea what to make of the Muggles. They're like the Smurfs or something. It's just...it's infuriating how indifferent and useless they are. Rah certainly has no excuse!

The only thing the Muggles told Rah about his mother is that they *thought* she gave him the key on the chain (she did, but none of them knew that). I'm pretty sure this was all supposed to be set-up for those other two books Stouffer mentioned earlier, but so far as I know, they were never made.

Actually no, Voldy never really figured into the lawsuit. It actually makes sense though - Stouffer's knowledge of the Harry Potter series consisted only of her speed-reading the first book. So she'd have no way of knowing about Voldemort's past or his turning all ugly and evil.

[barankhy.livejournal.com]

Next on the list is eighteen-year-old Boggs, so named because he is always dirty and smells like a swamp
...I can see why he'd hold a grudge against the Muggles.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

What's hilarious is that we're told earlier that Muggles get names based on their traits and personalities. So that sort of implies that Boggs has been filthy and smelly since birth.

[sttq.livejournal.com]

"Zyn's constant abuse beat them into submission. He owned their spirits, and their individual identities were as he decided they would be. They did whatever he told them to, at whatever time, whenever he told them to do it"

One, that is bull. Two, how is a child, a member of the target demographic, supposed to make sense of stuff like that?

*boggles* She only skimmed the first book, and she had the raw nerve to start up a lawsuit. Hwell. It seems I was right, after all. Nothing but a desperate bid for attention.

"Yeah, I got him right where I want him, oh, yes I do, diddy do - do!"

*through gritted teeth* Roald. Dahl. Would. Never. Have. Done. This. That man respected the intelligence of children. This is outrageous! We go from way-too-big words, as above, to infantile crap like this! What, if anything, was the woman thinking?

Hmmm... The Muggles are no longer just obnoxious pests. Rah is no longer a bastard who I'd like to smack around. They are now sending out creepy vibes. 'Fahrenheit 451' creepy vibes. It's like they're saying, "You do not conform to our perfect, colourless, uniform society. You are misfits, and we will treat you accordingly." Huh. Didn't think it was possible for a children's story *cough* to give an impression like that.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

"Huh. Didn't think it was possible for a children's story *cough* to give an impression like that."

Well, I do recall a children's story that was apparently written by neo-Nazis, about those evil, evil Jews. But still, your point stands.

I personally am scratching my head, wondering how Stouffer even thought that a moral about the joys of conformity would fly with children.

[sttq.livejournal.com]

I personally am scratching my head, wondering how Stouffer even thought that a moral about the joys of conformity would fly with children.

The way I see it, there are at least four possible reasons, none of them mutually exclusive.

1) Stouffer herself adored stories with such morals when she was a child, and we are now seeing the aftereffects.

2) Stouffer thought her crappy crap might exercise a kind of restraining influence on adventurous children (as if), to the benefit of the parents, and only of the parents.

3) This kind of moral is something that, even now, Stouffer genuinely believes will lead to happiness.

4) Stouffer had no clue what she was doing.

Oh, help us all.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

"Stouffer thought her crappy crap might exercise a kind of restraining influence on adventurous children (as if), to the benefit of the parents, and only of the parents."

I think that's what it is. I've heard people say that Rah is the sort of child a mother would love to have, always listening to others and not making waves. She probably didn't think that kids don't want to read about such a boring character.

[often-partisan.livejournal.com]

"we have the fourteen-year-old Patch"

Perhaps she should try suing Becca Fitzpatrick next?

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

*snrk* She should. Heck, both of those Patch dudes are also teenage rebels who are also described as bad boys.

[sos-sporkers.livejournal.com]

After reading your Hush Hush sporkings, and then reading this, the name Patch literally made me do a full-body shiver and gag. Ugh...

Someone should do a crossover of this thing...Patch can be a great villain on his own, and it would be awesome for him to team up with Zyn and kill all of the giggling smurfs...I mean, muggles, and Rah.

And then they can take over the world in all their over-the-top villain glory, and spend their days twirling their mustache!

[chibi-regalli.livejournal.com]

I know, same here. Creepy, isn't it?

Thing is, I think Zyn would be creeped out by the guy. Up until this point, he's been fairly normal and sympathetic, and Patch was a total psycho from the start.

[sos-sporkers.livejournal.com]

True...

How about this?

Patch takes over the Muggle village/town whilst Zyn is in exile and reigns them in a rule of terror. Zyn, being the brightest character in this book (not that that's saying much), figures out that the trick with his shadows and returns home to find the village people living under a Caligula-esque ruler. Being a rather nice and compassion individual, he takes up the sword and defeats Patch in an Epic Battle of Epic Destiny, and thus is heralded as a hero.

[chibi-regalli.livejournal.com]

Sounds good. Mostly because it has Patch dead, and Zyn getting the respect he deserves after all this idiocy.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

I would so love to see that story.

Plus, Rah would be such a useless dumbass, he'd just whine and whimper and not actually do anything, while Zyn actually saves everyone.

[sos-sporkers.livejournal.com]

Yes! The villagers would all see that their beloved Rah is useless in a moment of crisis, and will stop kissing his ass then.

Or do you think Rah would actually team up with Patch? Say...if the Muggles did something he was unhappy with. Seeing the kind of stuff he did to his brother, I really have no doubt that he'd be capable of establishing a kind of 'LOVE ME AND DESPAIR' reign.

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

My head canon for the series is that the Muggles, Rah, and Lady Catherine (who Rah and Zyn meet again) are obvious and useless to the point of it being utterly ridiculous, so Zyn is the only one actually going around and taking care of the kingdom. He's a knight and had to get to be badass.

[sos-sporkers.livejournal.com]

AWESOME.

Seriously, I would pay money to see Patch getting his ass kicked by Zyn. And after so long a period of outright abuse at the hands of the Muggles, Zyn deserves the chance to become the action hero we all know he is.

I doubt he's going stick around the Muggles after this, so he can totally join Charlie and Leah on their crime-fighting/supernatural-hunting team!

[zelda-queen.livejournal.com]

That sounds like such a great sequel. XD

[sos-sporkers.livejournal.com]

If I had time, I would totally write that fanfic.

[(Anonymous)]

Ah, screw it. Let's set the Nac Mac Feegle on these little twits!

[chibi-regalli.livejournal.com]

"Nevils"
Me reading after reading parody: Huh, the Ram one switched around the spooner thing and called them "vi" somethi... Vilens. Villains. Oh, COME ON, Stouffer! Are you really THAT lazy?

I think maybe all the Muggles are brain-damaged in addition to their myriad other mutations from the radiation. It would explain the idiot plot. Somehow, Rah got exposed to it as well, but Zyn's was a more delayed reaction up until this chapter. Seriously, dude, THE TREE IS RADIOACTIVE. Are you BRAIN DEAD?

[yamamanama.livejournal.com]

I think she meant manchineel tree, which is one of the most toxic plants. A metaphor for reading this novel.

Neville a half-muggle!?

[(Anonymous)]

Was this woman that stupid (Stouffer obviously)? Serious she actually said Neville was a Half-Blood? He's a PURE-BLOOD! Gah!