Betrayed: Chapter 22
Jul. 23rd, 2011 01:19 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
zelda_queenZeldaQueen: In which something happens and it's very sappy and stupid
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
Chapter 22
ZeldaQueen: Zoey starts up talking again, and everyone is of course all reverent and shuts up immediately. She says that any of the previous members who feel they can uphold the standards of being "authentic, faithful, wise, empathetic, and sincere" can stay if they like, but tells them that if they can't deal with new members chosen by merit rather than connections, they'd best not join. Personally, I think she's giving a bunch of high school-aged kids a wee bit too much credit. If these former Dark Daughters are supposed to be such two-faced bitches, how does Zoey know they just aren't lying and pretending to be all contrite and reformed so they can stick around in the prestigious club?
And to further prove my point, Zoey gives us this
"I caught the eyes of some of Aphrodite's old buddies and added, 'We won't hold the past against you. It's how you act from here on that counts.' A couple of the girls looked guiltily away from me, and a few more looked like they were trying hard not to cry. I was especially glad to see Deino meet my gaze steadily and nod somberly— maybe she wasn't so 'terrible' after all."
Zeldaqueen: All I got is that part of A Christmas Story where the teacher tries to guilt her class with a specific lecture on putting Flick up to sticking his tongue on the flag pole, while Ralphie and Schwartz (the two who put him up to it) look very serious and nod and look around the room.
Seriously, does it never occur to Zoey that people lie? I mean, I understand giving the former Dark Daughters a second chance, I honestly do. I think it's a great idea because hey, even though she completely bashed them in the last book, she has no idea of their feelings or motives. It's just...look at how she acts towards Deino though. In Marked, she was completely horrified by her and was catty in private and was so judgmental about how nasty naming yourself "terrible" is. And now, Zoey is impressed by Deino's acting abilities so oh, well, maybe she's not so bad! Never mind that in the last book she went on about how humans and men were evil. Never mind that we're supposed to see her and the rest of Aphrodite's circle as a bunch of bitches in the last book for running away on her. Never mind that she was painted in the worst light possible, with no redeeming traits at all. Hell, never mind that it doesn't seem to occur to Zoey that a girl who is established as a good actress and an ass-kisser is more likely to be cozying up to the new queen bee instead of genuinely showing a change of heart. No, Zoey has decided she is redeemable, so that's that.
*rubs face* Right. Moving on! Zoey continues the ritual and passes around the goblet ofwhine wine. She mentions "Guess no one minded that tonight's wine was absent the blood of a bullied fledgling" and I have to wonder what she expected. Did she really think that the students were going to start bitching about a lack of blood while teachers were around? Anyway, she thanks and dismisses the elements, ends the ritual, and everyone starts to disperse.
Okay! Is this over yet? No, it is not. Damn. Everyone heads over for making hand-prints in the wet cement, and Stevie Rae continues to complain about a headache and upset stomach. But of course, it's just that she's tired and hungry. Not like it could be anything else, right? Right?
Stevie Rae continues to be grumpy and Damien worries about her. Shaunee attributes it to PMS, leading Erin to comment "Yeah, I noticed earlier she was looking kinda pale and bloated, but I didn't want to be mean and say anything". Alllll righty then! Everyone is having fun and Jack provides wet towels for them to clean their hands off on, leading Zoey to note "the kid was certainly handy to have around". Lady, he's your friend's boyfriend, not a servant!
Erik tells Zoey that he's very glad that Neferet chose him to be on the prefect council, and Zoey decides not to tell him that it was actually her decision, because "I would probably let the air right out of his sails. Neferet was a big deal. And it really wouldn't hurt anything (except my ego) to let him think that she was the one who picked him". Oh my God, will SOMETHING HAPPEN???
For once the book listens to me, as Zoey notices the sound of Stevie Rae hacking up her lungs. Zoey goes all cold as she realizes what's going on, and tells Erik to get Neferet. And I will say, this part isn't too bad. Zoey heads over to Stevie Rae just as she starts coughing up blood in a towel, and I'm not sure if it's intentional or not, but the whole thing does have a rather detached feel to it giving the impression that Zoey doesn't quite believe it's happening.
And then it gets sappy
"I felt an arm go around me, and still I didn't move.
'She needs you, Zoey.' Damien's voice was shaking only a little. I opened my eyes then and stared at him. He was already crying.
'I don't think I can do this.'
His grip on my shoulders tightened. 'Yes, you can.You have to.'
'Zoey!' Stevie Rae sobbed.
Without another thought, I wrenched myself from Damien's arm and ran to my best friend. She was on her knees clutching the blood-soaked towel to her chest. She coughed and gagged again, and more blood sprayed from her mouth and nose.
'Get me more towels!' I snapped to Erin, who was sitting white-faced and silent beside Stevie Rae. Then I crouched in front of Stevie Rae. 'It's going to be okay. I promise. It's going to be okay.'
Stevie Rae was crying, and her tears were tinged red. She shook her head. 'It's not. It can't be. I'm dying.' Her voice was weak and gurgled as she tried to speak through the blood hemorrhaging in her lungs and throat.
'I'm staying with you. I won't let you be alone,' I said.
She grasped my hand and I was shocked by how cold hers was. 'I'm scared, Z.'
'I know, I'm scared, too. But we'll get through this together. I promise.'"
ZeldaQueen: Does it make me a horrible person that all I can think of is Tropic Thunder?
ZeldaQueen: I'm serious. I can totally hear the orchestra going at it in the background while Zoey cradles Stevie Rae Pietra-style and maybe strokes her face.
Damien brings a green candle and Zoey summons Earth to ease Stevie Rae's suffering and Stevie Rae is crying pink tears but goes on about how she's no longer afraid, all while there's the smell of apples and hay and the sound of birds chirping. I expect one of them to ask Stevie Rae if she remembers the Shire, if things go on like this for much longer.
Neferet comes in at this point, and puts Stevie Rae on a stretcher to take her away. Zoey insists that she, Erin, Shaunee, and Damien will all be coming along. Stevie Rae also refuses to drink the liquid painkiller Neferet offers her becausea little fall of rain can hardly hurt her now the power of Earth is numbing the pain.
They take Stevie Rae inside to the infirmary, and we're told "The air around us was still filled with apple blossoms and birdsong", which is a line I'd expect to see in a romantic-comedy stage show. Stevie Rae opens her eyes and - FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
"'Would you tell my mamma and daddy that I love them?' I could understand her, but she sounded weak, and her voice was filled with a terrible wetness.
'Of course I will,' I said quickly.
'And do something else for me?'
'Anything.'
'You don't really have a mamma or a daddy, so would you tell my mamma that you're their daughter now? I think I'd worry about them less if I know y'all have each other.'
Tears were pouring down my cheeks and I had to take several sobbing breaths before I could answer her. 'Don't worry about anything. I'll tell them.'
Her eyes fluttered and she smiled again. 'Good. Mamma will make chocolate chip cookies for you.' With obvious effort, she opened her eyes again and looked around at Damien, Shaunee, and Erin. 'Y'all stick with Zoey. Don't let anything pull you apart.'
'Don't worry,' Damien whispered through his tears.
'We'll take care of her for you,' Shaunee managed to say. Erin was clutching Shaunee's hand and crying hard, but she nodded in agreement and smiled at Stevie Rae.
'Good,' Stevie Rae said. Then she closed her eyes.
'Z, I think I'm gonna sleep for a while now, 'kay?'
'Okay, honey,' I said.
Her eyelids lifted once more and she looked up at me. 'Will you stay with me?'
I hugged her closer. 'I'm not going anywhere. You just rest. We'll all be right here with you.'
''Kay ...” she said softly.
Stevie Rae shut her eyes. She took a few more gurgling breaths"
ZeldaQueen: . . .
ZeldaQueen: I...what was that? Were the Cast ladies angling for the literary equivalent of Oscar bait? That has got to be the most teeth-rotting, sappy, overblown bilge I've ever had the misfortune of reading outside of fanfiction! (I'd say period, but I still give Gethesemane that title)
Oh, and isn't that sweet, Stevie Rae having her parents be Zoey's new parents? So far as I know, they never show up again. The Weasleys they ain't.
So yeah, Stevie Rae dies, and I know I'm a horrible, horrible person for this but I'm just glad that everyone's shutting up finally. LORD!
Still, it's not over yet. Next chapter is *shudders* the mourning period
Onward to: Chapter 23
Back to: Chapter 21
Back to: Table of Contents
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
Chapter 22
ZeldaQueen: Zoey starts up talking again, and everyone is of course all reverent and shuts up immediately. She says that any of the previous members who feel they can uphold the standards of being "authentic, faithful, wise, empathetic, and sincere" can stay if they like, but tells them that if they can't deal with new members chosen by merit rather than connections, they'd best not join. Personally, I think she's giving a bunch of high school-aged kids a wee bit too much credit. If these former Dark Daughters are supposed to be such two-faced bitches, how does Zoey know they just aren't lying and pretending to be all contrite and reformed so they can stick around in the prestigious club?
And to further prove my point, Zoey gives us this
"I caught the eyes of some of Aphrodite's old buddies and added, 'We won't hold the past against you. It's how you act from here on that counts.' A couple of the girls looked guiltily away from me, and a few more looked like they were trying hard not to cry. I was especially glad to see Deino meet my gaze steadily and nod somberly— maybe she wasn't so 'terrible' after all."
Zeldaqueen: All I got is that part of A Christmas Story where the teacher tries to guilt her class with a specific lecture on putting Flick up to sticking his tongue on the flag pole, while Ralphie and Schwartz (the two who put him up to it) look very serious and nod and look around the room.
Seriously, does it never occur to Zoey that people lie? I mean, I understand giving the former Dark Daughters a second chance, I honestly do. I think it's a great idea because hey, even though she completely bashed them in the last book, she has no idea of their feelings or motives. It's just...look at how she acts towards Deino though. In Marked, she was completely horrified by her and was catty in private and was so judgmental about how nasty naming yourself "terrible" is. And now, Zoey is impressed by Deino's acting abilities so oh, well, maybe she's not so bad! Never mind that in the last book she went on about how humans and men were evil. Never mind that we're supposed to see her and the rest of Aphrodite's circle as a bunch of bitches in the last book for running away on her. Never mind that she was painted in the worst light possible, with no redeeming traits at all. Hell, never mind that it doesn't seem to occur to Zoey that a girl who is established as a good actress and an ass-kisser is more likely to be cozying up to the new queen bee instead of genuinely showing a change of heart. No, Zoey has decided she is redeemable, so that's that.
*rubs face* Right. Moving on! Zoey continues the ritual and passes around the goblet of
Okay! Is this over yet? No, it is not. Damn. Everyone heads over for making hand-prints in the wet cement, and Stevie Rae continues to complain about a headache and upset stomach. But of course, it's just that she's tired and hungry. Not like it could be anything else, right? Right?
Stevie Rae continues to be grumpy and Damien worries about her. Shaunee attributes it to PMS, leading Erin to comment "Yeah, I noticed earlier she was looking kinda pale and bloated, but I didn't want to be mean and say anything". Alllll righty then! Everyone is having fun and Jack provides wet towels for them to clean their hands off on, leading Zoey to note "the kid was certainly handy to have around". Lady, he's your friend's boyfriend, not a servant!
Erik tells Zoey that he's very glad that Neferet chose him to be on the prefect council, and Zoey decides not to tell him that it was actually her decision, because "I would probably let the air right out of his sails. Neferet was a big deal. And it really wouldn't hurt anything (except my ego) to let him think that she was the one who picked him". Oh my God, will SOMETHING HAPPEN???
For once the book listens to me, as Zoey notices the sound of Stevie Rae hacking up her lungs. Zoey goes all cold as she realizes what's going on, and tells Erik to get Neferet. And I will say, this part isn't too bad. Zoey heads over to Stevie Rae just as she starts coughing up blood in a towel, and I'm not sure if it's intentional or not, but the whole thing does have a rather detached feel to it giving the impression that Zoey doesn't quite believe it's happening.
And then it gets sappy
"I felt an arm go around me, and still I didn't move.
'She needs you, Zoey.' Damien's voice was shaking only a little. I opened my eyes then and stared at him. He was already crying.
'I don't think I can do this.'
His grip on my shoulders tightened. 'Yes, you can.You have to.'
'Zoey!' Stevie Rae sobbed.
Without another thought, I wrenched myself from Damien's arm and ran to my best friend. She was on her knees clutching the blood-soaked towel to her chest. She coughed and gagged again, and more blood sprayed from her mouth and nose.
'Get me more towels!' I snapped to Erin, who was sitting white-faced and silent beside Stevie Rae. Then I crouched in front of Stevie Rae. 'It's going to be okay. I promise. It's going to be okay.'
Stevie Rae was crying, and her tears were tinged red. She shook her head. 'It's not. It can't be. I'm dying.' Her voice was weak and gurgled as she tried to speak through the blood hemorrhaging in her lungs and throat.
'I'm staying with you. I won't let you be alone,' I said.
She grasped my hand and I was shocked by how cold hers was. 'I'm scared, Z.'
'I know, I'm scared, too. But we'll get through this together. I promise.'"
ZeldaQueen: Does it make me a horrible person that all I can think of is Tropic Thunder?
ZeldaQueen: I'm serious. I can totally hear the orchestra going at it in the background while Zoey cradles Stevie Rae Pietra-style and maybe strokes her face.
Damien brings a green candle and Zoey summons Earth to ease Stevie Rae's suffering and Stevie Rae is crying pink tears but goes on about how she's no longer afraid, all while there's the smell of apples and hay and the sound of birds chirping. I expect one of them to ask Stevie Rae if she remembers the Shire, if things go on like this for much longer.
Neferet comes in at this point, and puts Stevie Rae on a stretcher to take her away. Zoey insists that she, Erin, Shaunee, and Damien will all be coming along. Stevie Rae also refuses to drink the liquid painkiller Neferet offers her because
They take Stevie Rae inside to the infirmary, and we're told "The air around us was still filled with apple blossoms and birdsong", which is a line I'd expect to see in a romantic-comedy stage show. Stevie Rae opens her eyes and - FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!
"'Would you tell my mamma and daddy that I love them?' I could understand her, but she sounded weak, and her voice was filled with a terrible wetness.
'Of course I will,' I said quickly.
'And do something else for me?'
'Anything.'
'You don't really have a mamma or a daddy, so would you tell my mamma that you're their daughter now? I think I'd worry about them less if I know y'all have each other.'
Tears were pouring down my cheeks and I had to take several sobbing breaths before I could answer her. 'Don't worry about anything. I'll tell them.'
Her eyes fluttered and she smiled again. 'Good. Mamma will make chocolate chip cookies for you.' With obvious effort, she opened her eyes again and looked around at Damien, Shaunee, and Erin. 'Y'all stick with Zoey. Don't let anything pull you apart.'
'Don't worry,' Damien whispered through his tears.
'We'll take care of her for you,' Shaunee managed to say. Erin was clutching Shaunee's hand and crying hard, but she nodded in agreement and smiled at Stevie Rae.
'Good,' Stevie Rae said. Then she closed her eyes.
'Z, I think I'm gonna sleep for a while now, 'kay?'
'Okay, honey,' I said.
Her eyelids lifted once more and she looked up at me. 'Will you stay with me?'
I hugged her closer. 'I'm not going anywhere. You just rest. We'll all be right here with you.'
''Kay ...” she said softly.
Stevie Rae shut her eyes. She took a few more gurgling breaths"
ZeldaQueen: . . .
ZeldaQueen: I...what was that? Were the Cast ladies angling for the literary equivalent of Oscar bait? That has got to be the most teeth-rotting, sappy, overblown bilge I've ever had the misfortune of reading outside of fanfiction! (I'd say period, but I still give Gethesemane that title)
Oh, and isn't that sweet, Stevie Rae having her parents be Zoey's new parents? So far as I know, they never show up again. The Weasleys they ain't.
So yeah, Stevie Rae dies, and I know I'm a horrible, horrible person for this but I'm just glad that everyone's shutting up finally. LORD!
Still, it's not over yet. Next chapter is *shudders* the mourning period
Onward to: Chapter 23
Back to: Chapter 21
Back to: Table of Contents
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-23 06:02 pm (UTC)Not a combination of this:
And this:
Oh well. Who cares! She's dead--and probably won't stay that way, so I am going to celebrate while I can. EVERYBODY SPANK-DANCE.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-23 06:17 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-23 06:51 pm (UTC)That's it? That was so...not...emotional. At all.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-21 04:31 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-23 09:33 pm (UTC)And also YES, ACTING. LYING. KISSING ASS OF HEAD HONCHO.
"Yeah, I noticed earlier she was looking kinda pale and bloated, but I didn't want to be mean and say anything".
So, in a world where a fledgling can drop dead at any moment, other fledglings don't like to say things like "Hey, you look super-pale, you don't look so good" because it could be taken as an insult, not care over their friend's welfare?
I hate these people.
For once the book listens to me, as Zoey notices the sound of Stevie Rae hacking up her lungs.
Well, what did she think was going to happen? I know she hated Elliot, but damn, how do you forget this little detail--
...So Stevie Rae dies the same way Elliot did. Stevie Rae gets to be all calm but weepy and "I love you all" while Elliot dies sobbing, saying he doesn't want to die, and begging for someone to help him. Zoey sobs and weeps for Stevie Rae and she rolls her eyes and scoffs for Elliot.
Am I the only one seriously pissed off by this? It's like the Cast ladies decided that only their beloved pet characters could die a dignified and "too pure for this sinful earth" death or get mourned, and to hell with anyone that Zoey doesn't like.
(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-24 01:04 pm (UTC)Oh, this was exactly what I was thinking about there. I mean, the school takes serious steps to keep the students as healthy as possible (while still giving them candy-cereal and sugar-packed drinks, I guess), so you'd think that every little cough would be a sign that something was going on. If my best friend suddenly started feeling sick in that kind of environment, my thoughts would definitely immediately go to "D8 NOO, could she be rejecting? I've got to do something!"
...So Stevie Rae dies the same way Elliot did. Stevie Rae gets to be all calm but weepy and "I love you all" while Elliot dies sobbing, saying he doesn't want to die, and begging for someone to help him.
This is why I simply didn't give a damn that Stevie Rae died, but Elliot's death actually made me care about him.
(no subject)
Date: 2012-02-21 04:43 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-23 09:34 pm (UTC)So basically nothing happened....
(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-24 06:41 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-24 07:26 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2011-07-24 01:16 pm (UTC)Firstly, like hell Zoey and her friends uphold such values. Secondly, I agree that Zoey is naive to think that the former members of the Dark Daughters are suddenly going to be all sweetness and light to her now that she's in charge. However, I wish that we had actually seen evidence of Deino and the rest of Aphrodite's minions actually acting so unscrupulously, because I sure as hell don't remember it happening. As with much lazy writing nowadays, whatever the Sue says goes and we're just supposed to believe what we're told Just Because. C'mon, we've Zoey acting like a bitch more than they ever have so far!
That death scene was so boring! It's like it just happened and just ended in such a short amount of time, that I just didn't care. And like every kind of Suethor death (or 2nd Suethor in Command, in this case), it has to drag and be riddled with cliches! And trust me, I heard the orchestra swell in my head, too :D Seriously, that was such a corny, Disney-style death with the smell of apples and birdsong or whatever, I want to laugh so badly :D
You know, I felt more for Elliot when he died and it actually was frightening to read because he was so frightened and Neferet was just so callous. That is the kind of death scene that makes you feel something!
'You don't really have a mamma or a daddy, so would you tell my mamma that you're their daughter now? I think I'd worry about them less if I know y'all have each other.'
Zoey is such a Mary Sue, that she even gets other people's parents served to her on a silver platter! And Zoey's parents are hardly the violent and abusive kind, so that's a big fuck you to them >.<
(no subject)
Date: 2011-09-22 04:53 pm (UTC)I call bullshit on this. Didn't the first book say that any time they got sick meant they were going to die, etc
"'You don't really have a mamma or a daddy, so would you tell my mamma that you're their daughter now? I think I'd worry about them less if I know y'all have each other.'"
Oh lord as if anyone would actually say this.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-11-09 09:31 pm (UTC)