Free Willy

Mar. 30th, 2014 04:54 pm
zelda_queen: (Zelda Queen Spork)
ZeldaQueen: Hey, everybody! To those who get announcements on postings to [livejournal.com profile] das_sporking, I am very, very sorry about the one that went out not long ago. Posting has not yet resumed. I had meant to submit something to the pending approval list, and it kind of just went straight through. So I'm sorry if I caused any confusion there. To make it up to you all, I thought I'd spork a one-shot by BeatriceTheGolden, a rather infamous fanficcer in the Hetalia fandom, known for her rather...erm, extreme kinks (specifically guro). As the warning tags for this post indicate, we're getting bestiality. More on that with the author's notes, though!
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zelda_queen: (Default)
ZeldaQueen: WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS TWO UNDERAGE CHILDREN ENGAGING IN SEXUAL ACTIVITIES, ALL OF WHICH IS DESCRIBED IN THE MOST LOVING AND DETAILED MANNER POSSIBLE!

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zelda_queen: (Zelda Queen Spork)
ZeldaQueen: WARNING! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS AN UNDERAGE GIRL PULLING OFF HER BROTHER'S UNDERPANTS AND EXPOSING HIS JUNK TO THE WORLD, WHILE LAUGHING AT HIS MISFORTUNE! IT ALSO CONTAINS A DIFFERENT UNDERAGE GIRL GIVING SAID BROTHER A BLOWJOB! DON'T READ THIS IF SHARP IMPLEMENTS ARE AROUND!

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ZeldaQueen: PEOPLE! MORE WARNINGS! THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS MORE TICKLE-TORTURE, WITH AN UNDERAGE GIRL GRABBING A DUDE'S JUNK, AND THEN GETTING A SPANK, ALL OF WHICH IS DESCRIBED IN GREAT DETAIL!

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ZeldaQueen: All the same warnings as before, ladies and gentlemen! This chapter contains a detailed description of a twelve-year-old being strung up and forcibly stripped and tickled, while he makes it clear he doesn't consent!

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zelda_queen: (Default)
ZeldaQueen: Once again, warnings! This chapter contains a detailed description of a twelve-year-old being strung up and forcibly stripped and tickled, while he makes it clear he doesn't consent!

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zelda_queen: (Default)
ZeldaQueen: Before we begin, warnings! This chapter contains urine drinking, and not in the narmy, silly way done in My Inner Life!
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Raxis: Hello peeps, I'm back for another go with Queeny! :D

ZeldaQueen: Glad to have you, Raxis! *to the viewers* Folks, you all remember Neil. How could you not? Hogwarts Exposed can only be forgotten through heavy drinking coupled with a lobotomy.

Raxis: I'm not sure that's sufficient.

ZeldaQueen: Possibly the best we could do. In any case, we sang Halle-hallelueh, Neil had gone away for some time. Unfortunately, he's back. And this time, he worte some original fiction.

Raxis: Dear god, no. How does it compare with Hogwarts Exposed? I've never actually read this thing before; is it worse?

ZeldaQueen: What sort of a question is that? He no longer has Harry Potter canon to mask his blatant fetishes and pedophila with. Of COURSE it's worse!

Raxis: Aww, shit, you're right. Hey, anyone mind going into Fire Emblem or something so we can ask the Demon King to munch Neil's soul?


ZeldaQueen: It would likely give him indigestion. So, let us instead spork it! For your enjoyment pleasure eye-gouging  -
Raxis: Hah, the only one in any sort of enjoyment is that piece of slime who wrote this.

ZeldaQueen: - We give you The Gang!

Raxis: That's the name?

ZeldaQueen: Yes. Doesn't it just sound like a happy children's-block show?

Raxis: Depressingly, yes.

ZeldaQueen: :D Let's get started!



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zelda_queen: (Default)
ZeldaQueen: Okay, ladies and germs, this is it! Harlequin hentai sex, all here in one nasty-ass chapter of grody splooge. I'm not sporking this myself. Honestly, I'm too chicken to touch it with a ten-foot pole. Thankfully though, the very brave, very awesome [livejournal.com profile] das_mervin has requested this extra for spork and country. Let's give her a hand, folks!

Oh, and I'm vacating the sporking chamber for this bit. Because of this, the drinking game shall be temporarily put on hold. Don't worry, I'm sure you all will find plenty of points in here to get stone-drunk over.

Also - it probably goes without saying, but this chapter is Not Safe For Work


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